Post the Worst "For Sale" Picture You've Seen.

[JimJohnston]

this is just a cut/paste from "kijiji"


Buy my stupid ex-boyfriend's boat: It's cheap, like his excuses!
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Date Listed 10-May-13
Last Edited 11-May-13
Price $1,500.00
Address Nepean, ON K2H 1A6, Canada
View map
For Sale By Owner
Make Other
Model Alberg 22
Colour Blue
My stupid ex boyfriend is a commitment-phobe, so I guess it's no surprise that he wasn't up to the commitment involved in owning a boat. Like every other good thing in his life, my stupid ex boyfriend walked away from a beautiful sailboat, and left me to pick up the pieces. So I`m selling it. Don`t worry; I`m not a crazy jilted woman. I`ve got the legal right to sell this beauty.
The boat is actually quite wonderful, unlike my stupid ex boyfriend. It's a classic Alberg 22, with a full keel, a furling jib (something the stupid ex boyfriend never fully understood) and a suite of sails, all in pretty good condition. It's also unique in that it's got a black mast, and from the research I've done, it might be one of a kind in that sense. One of a kind--definitely not like my stupid ex boyfriend. It also has some very valuable opening, screened ports, probably worth more than I'm asking for the boat just themselves. I just want this thing out of my hands!
With a little dedication and work, this boat could be turned into something really special, not like my stupid ex boyfriend. No amount of work, dedication or patience could save him. Not even Christ can save him. Luckily for you, he never followed through on his plans for the boat (typical). Otherwise, who knows what kind of disaster he would have left in his wake (also typical). So do me, and yourself a favour, and buy my stupid ex boyfriend's ex-sailboat. Deals like this don't come around every day! The boat must be owned by a member at Nepean Sailing Club, or removed, by Wednesday. If not, I'm having it trucked away, and the price will go up. Hurry!!

What you get:
Alberg 22 sailboat, sound hull and deck with amazing woodwork both interior and exterior
Folding cradle
Custom-made skeleton and canvas boat cover for winter
All sails, both hank-on or furling configurations
The satisfaction of knowing that my stupid ex boyfriend has nothing, and you have a beautiful boat

[snort]

Stupid ex-boyrfiend:



Good thing there are no uniquely identifiable features on the boat.

[Cormorant]

Originally Posted by Travelnik

Maybe the best ad yet?
1996 Lund Alaskan - $3000 - Manitoba Powerboats, Motorboats For Sale - Kijiji Manitoba Canada.

Just in case that link ever goes dead, I thought we could immortalize his advertising copy here with a copy-and-paste. Also, what really cracks me up is that as of today, his hit counter is at 326,890.
-------------

"Ok, this here is the prime honey hauler. Lemme break it down for you. In one month it will be boat season. Until then, all you have to do is wax it.

"Float up to the beach in this bad boy and the hoes will flock. Happens every year! Every summer it's the same old thing, give me a ride they ask. I'll take my bikini top off they say, but it doesn't end there. With this 1996 30hp Mercury two stroke you can practically call yourself a chemist mixing the gas and oil! Plus the 72'' beam means you can load this baby up with all the biggest beach whales (trust me, i know).

"This wave slammer hauls. If the girl doesn't take their top off that's ok because the wind will blow it off for sure. 40 year old virgin? girlfriend or wife cut you off at home? No problem. This is the boat for you. Built in 1995 the creators definitely had puss magnet on the build sheet. That means this boat has been hauling in fish and pink snapper for over 15 years. This is a bachelors dream right here and you wont find a better price. For one easy payment of 3000 bucks this chick magnet will be yours. I hate to see it go but its time for some other lucky guy to take this boat down to tuna town. But that's not all this trailer has guides for when your hammered drunk at the end of the day you can still loader up. Shoot me a reply and make your wet dreams a reality"

[MBLittle]

http://virgin.craigslist.org/boa/3802136012.html

[sanibel sailor]

Originally Posted by Cormorant

Just in case that link ever goes dead, I thought we could immortalize his advertising copy here with a copy-and-paste. Also, what really cracks me up is that as of today, his hit counter is at 326,890.
-------------

"Ok, this here is the prime honey hauler. Lemme break it down for you. In one month it will be boat season. Until then, all you have to do is wax it.

"Float up to the beach in this bad boy and the hoes will flock. Happens every year! Every summer it's the same old thing, give me a ride they ask. I'll take my bikini top off they say, but it doesn't end there. With this 1996 30hp Mercury two stroke you can practically call yourself a chemist mixing the gas and oil! Plus the 72'' beam means you can load this baby up with all the biggest beach whales (trust me, i know).

"This wave slammer hauls. If the girl doesn't take their top off that's ok because the wind will blow it off for sure. 40 year old virgin? girlfriend or wife cut you off at home? No problem. This is the boat for you. Built in 1995 the creators definitely had puss magnet on the build sheet. That means this boat has been hauling in fish and pink snapper for over 15 years. This is a bachelors dream right here and you wont find a better price. For one easy payment of 3000 bucks this chick magnet will be yours. I hate to see it go but its time for some other lucky guy to take this boat down to tuna town. But that's not all this trailer has guides for when your hammered drunk at the end of the day you can still loader up. Shoot me a reply and make your wet dreams a reality"

you win!!!!

[Sand crab]

Not pic but text.

"this is a great truely blue water vessel , 3/4 keep ruder atch , very rugard , hydrological steering i boug as a project i was built with a experiment carbon fiber mask which failed i punched a good mast for her , that is in fort Myers, i get full price i can let it go, was going deck step the old one i i let go if get the asking price still needs pant , and pulled bottom job, Morgan st-errs , runs drives, very rugged under priced blue water cruiser ,boats is locked in Florida any questions call 502 3668233 great wind less , 12 thousand pounds of lead keel if you want a project boat that can sail the seven seas this is it seller rezerve the right to remove this add for other sale at eny time ,, sold as is where"
On Ebay now.
Morgan 46 Foot Sailboat For Sale in Sailboats | eBay Motors

[denverd0n]

Hoping that was written by someone who is not a native speaker of English. In that case, I would give them a bit of slack. On the other hand, if you are trying to sell your boat to English speakers, you really should make a bit of an effort to get a good translation done of your advertisement.

(Sadly, I wouldn't be surprised to find that it is someone whose native language is English, and they are just bone-idle lazy about their writing, and stupid about their advertisement.)

[Capt Phil]

My guess is someone who enjoys typing after a pint of rum... only guessing, no offence intended... Phil

[krafthaus]

Originally Posted by denverd0n

Yeah, I suppose a picture of a bunch of bikini-clad women might attract the 20-something juveniles out there who are just dreaming. But my guess is that the majority of serious boat buyers are going to see that and move on. I certainly would. I would see that advertisement and assume that the seller knows that he can't get the price that he wants by selling the boat on its own merits. Either that or he, himself, is a 20-something juvenile (emotionally, if not actually) and not someone I want to try to deal with. In either case, that picture doesn't say "serious seller" to me.

OK I'm 51, not "20-something", but I'm not Dead Yet either! That's one nice pic to sell a boat with.

And while I'm at it one other piece of advice - doesn't matter where you get your appetite, as long as you eat at home! Now where's that boat?

[cwyckham]

70' x 28' soaking wet Catamaran

Asking $40,000!!!!

[sanibel sailor]

Flybridge and a tuna tower!

[snort]

Originally Posted by cwyckham

70' x 28' soaking wet Catamaran

Asking $40,000!!!!

Must be a typo. I believe you get paid $40K to assume responsibility.

How did an Oklahoma tornado affect a boat in British Columbia?

[senormechanico]

That's gotta be in the top two or three from this thread.



Not for sale (yet), but probably just a matter of time:
Latitude 38 - 'Lectronic Latitude

[snort]

Originally Posted by senormechanico

That's gotta be in the top two or three from this thread.



Not for sale (yet), but probably just a matter of time:
Latitude 38 - 'Lectronic Latitude

Just wait till the owner attaches rocket boosters to the sides and pressurizes the plywood to make the catamaran-cum-rocketship!
Then it will really be worth something!

[janice142]

Originally Posted by snort

Just wait till the owner attaches rocket boosters to the sides and pressurizes the plywood to make the catamaran-cum-rocketship!
Then it will really be worth something!

Regardless, an individual set out to build a boat and she's actually been launched. How many (percentage) actually take a plan to fruition? No, she's not the "seagoing sloop" we admire from afar, but she floats -- and like the article said, on a fairly even keel.

Latitude 38 - 'Lectronic Latitude
I admire anyone who actually does what they say they will do. There are far too many braggarts in the world who talk the talk, but that's it. Frankly, I wouldn't mind meeting the builders one day -- and don't forget: he's floating.

Lots of dreamers never get past the "wish-stage" for one reason or another.