Crew NOT Available.

[infinitethought]

I'm fat, over 47 years old, absolutely not interested in crewing. I'm anti social and at the same time I have no friends. And I smell.

I snore at a recorded Decibal level of 8.9 DBS, (as officially recorded at the United Snorers of America, of which I'm a very respected member) uncouth to even the politest person, and have no idea how to make popcorn or coffee.

I do know how to complain and make strange popping noises with my ears. I usually do this at the most inopportune time.

I.....................Okay I'll stop. If you've read this far, hope you had a good laugh.


All the best to you old and new Ancient Mariners of the Sea.
(I'm of the brand new kind.)

[David_Old_Jersey]

I think this should have been posted in here:-

Single Sailors Seeking Soul Mates

I am told that women like honesty in a fella........let us know how that goes

[Blue Stocking]

Sounds normal to me--get to the bad part

[Jesse]

We should get along just fine.

[Blue Stocking]

Must be something about that PNW water that nurtures good crew.
Charlie cobra taking on O'Joy, his benevolent buddy Scott---and now you

[zeehag]

at least you are not svelte and gorgeous and narcissistic..lol--too many men describe selves as atlas or hercules or some adonis-type god...LOL.....

[jdoe71]

That's a great resume, but can you break wind with the best? I mean, can you make the boat shake? The ground tremble? Leaves are blown off trees? Your emissions cause nearby air quality monitors to go off scale? When fed beans you are required by law to wear a hazardous gas sign? This prized quality would seem to nicely complete your qualifications.

[scook1]

I have read so many crew available of 20-25 year olds who speak four languages, play the guitar, know how to fix a torn sail, and can do anything else ever necessary. It is nice to hear something different.
Spencer

[infinitethought]

Glad you guys had fun with it.

As I always say "The Only truth about truth, is that truth is relative."

[SkiprJohn]

I appreciate your honesty but you are bit too young and well-mannered to crew for me.
regards

[Reality Check]

Great qualifications for Single handing!

[Ex-Calif]

Originally Posted by infinitethought

I'm fat, over 47 years old, absolutely not interested in crewing. I'm anti social and at the same time I have no friends. And I smell.

<snip>

All the best to you old and new Ancient Mariners of the Sea.
(I'm of the brand new kind.)

What do you smell like? Puppies? Warm chocolate chip cookies? Week old sweat socks?

Welcome aboard.

[infinitethought]

Originally Posted by Ex-Calif

What do you smell like? Puppies? Warm chocolate chip cookies? Week old sweat socks?

Welcome aboard.

How the hell did you know I smell like those 3 things ??

[infinitethought]

Originally Posted by scook1

I have read so many crew available of 20-25 year olds who speak four languages, play the guitar, know how to fix a torn sail, and can do anything else ever necessary. It is nice to hear something different.
Spencer

Well I can't do those things but I can navigate with a bandanna tied over my eyes, if that helps ?

Just give me a tuning fork, a ballpeen hammer, a jewelers screwdriver, a welders mask, and a copy of the farmers Almanac. (The 1908 edition not the 1907 one.) Works every time.

[sailorboy1]

I was going to see if you wanted to crew for me. But I only allow those who promise to drink all my beer and not buy any themselves.