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Old 14-11-2012, 11:52   #1
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"What makes the perfect boat woman...perfect"

For us guys…this is a topic that eludes us or at least me. To clarify, if you’re single, been married a few time, then it is quite the quandary. After awhile you can become a little gun shy. My first wife had motion sickness and sailing was completely off the charts so to speak. So I sailed alone most of the time and she would never allow my son to go with me, putting the fear of God in him when ever the subject came up. After 10 years, we were done.
Wife #2 said she wanted to grow her kids with me and sail away. We had known one another for three years and were pretty good friends. A lot of promises were made but after almost 6 years and her kids ready for college and the other out of High school. She thanked me for the house but sailing was not in her horoscope readings anymore. The marriage ended on that note. That was 12 years ago and although I have gone out with a few women, nothing ever blossomed when the subject of sailing long term came up.
Some of my well intentioned friends told me not to worry. That boat women are in sailing ports. But I was skeptical. Others had told me it was not the case. That they found most women to be nesters. Not that I even know what that is.
So one day I was reading on another sailing forum and happened to run across a person who found his sailing partner on a crew available forum. Reluctantly I gave it a shot. The person I met really opened my eyes to the whole women who know how to sail subject. Sailing, generally, is an easy task. Seamanship can take a lifetime. But compatibility and a gypsy soul is something that cannot be taught. The person has a sense of adventure or doesn’t.
I have been a rolling stone most of my life. Maybe not like Fatty Goodlander but quite close really. I’ve worked in Steel Mills, surveyed oil fields in the znorth West Territories, Office jobs, Engineering and Machinist. Travelled a lot and when I tire of living somewhere…I up and leave. So for me the boat life is a perfect fit. I can go where I want and when I want, weather permitting.
This person I met is positive, enthusiastic and loves the idea of sailing around with no real destination in mind. They are responsible and out going. I have a particularly healthy lifestyle and so do they. We are like thinkers. By that I mean if I have a thought, It is soon verbalized by the other. Pretty neat stuff. We are both citizens of other countries living in other countries. We have hung out some and decided to sail together with no real time table in mind.
So I think I’m on the right track here. Find a person that parallels with your personality and teach them basic seamanship and allow them to grow at their own pace regarding the sailing and cruising world. Any input would be great. I think this is a topic that has not been discussed too much here. I know we have many cruisers taking off who are married or at least co-habitating and sailing around. What’s your input?
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Old 14-11-2012, 12:00   #2
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

I was just going for large breasts and and a phallic obsession with my phallus. Everything else comes out in the wash.
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Old 14-11-2012, 12:06   #3
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

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I was just going for large breasts and and a phallic obsession with my phallus. Everything else comes out in the wash.
Well.....at least your honest!

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Old 14-11-2012, 12:09   #4
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I think a better question is, of cruising couples, how many built their dream together and how many were already living the dream when they met someone?

You will also find that there are couples that are not cruising because when one partner didn't want to set out, the other partner prioritized the relationship over cruising.

If you have a number one priority that is independent of your relationship, you may have to accept that you will spend most of your time pursuing that priority alone. It sounds like at this point you will be happier living that dream and you may or may not run into someone compatible while you are out there. Looking for someone to fill a predefined niche usually doesn't work out that well in the long run.
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Old 14-11-2012, 12:23   #5
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

Celestial, first let me say I' m the luckiest guy around, my admiral loves sailing as much as me and loves cruising. Wants to RTW.

But it wasn't always like that. She had never sailed when she met me. I was divorced and had been single for several years. I knew (from previous bad experience) that my next partner need to have that " spark of adventure" in her.

While sailing is vital in my life, if her dream was climbing every mountain in the world, i would join her as long as it was adventure.

Fortunately, she took to sailing like a fish in the water.

The important part is finding a woman who loves adventure and doesn' t have a problem with being wet and cold for days on end - she just loves the adventure.

I'm even luckier, my admiral thinks it's a gas to get all dressed up and hit the high life in town. She looks great in both an evening gown or in sailing foulies ( just how lucky can a guy get? And no she doesn't have any sisters LOL)
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Old 14-11-2012, 12:53   #6
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Took 30 years to learn to get along with the first wife, thought some days it seems it might take 30 more. Could not imaging going through all that again.

If you are shed of the burden (s), why saddle the horse again, knowing what the outcome will be again (and again) ?

Living alone is miserable, but a lap dog will give you companionship, and never starts an agreement.

People searching for a different outcome doing the same action should figure out men and women are like oil and water.

My advice? Maltese. Small, does not shed, good watchdog, not big eaters, and makes the perfect platinum blonde. Get two, their small.

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Old 14-11-2012, 13:00   #7
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

Or a hot Danish gal with long legs, long blond hair and an enormous appetite for living..........

We've got a scottish terrier that rules our lives, but I'm not quite married to her (although for some reason my wife got upset one night as we were going to sleep and I said "good night darling-oh and you too Vinni (Vinni is the admiral).

Not quite sure why

Anyone able to tell me?
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Old 14-11-2012, 13:16   #8
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

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Originally Posted by Greenhand View Post
I think a better question is, of cruising couples, how many built their dream together and how many were already living the dream when they met someone?

You will also find that there are couples that are not cruising because when one partner didn't want to set out, the other partner prioritized the relationship over cruising.

If you have a number one priority that is independent of your relationship, you may have to accept that you will spend most of your time pursuing that priority alone. It sounds like at this point you will be happier living that dream and you may or may not run into someone compatible while you are out there. Looking for someone to fill a predefined niche usually doesn't work out that well in the long run.
That would be a good question (how many built their dream together and how many were already living the dream when they met someone?). Wife #1 wanted nothing to do with it and Wife#2 said she did until she figured out how much work it might be and how uncomfortable it is sometimes. My new friend was looking for the adventure and we have a lot in common. But I still think sailing skills are way easier to teach someone than trying to change someones outlook on adventure.

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Celestial, first let me say I' m the luckiest guy around, my admiral loves sailing as much as me and loves cruising. Wants to RTW.

But it wasn't always like that. She had never sailed when she met me. I was divorced and had been single for several years. I knew (from previous bad experience) that my next partner need to have that " spark of adventure" in her.

While sailing is vital in my life, if her dream was climbing every mountain in the world, i would join her as long as it was adventure.

Fortunately, she took to sailing like a fish in the water.

The important part is finding a woman who loves adventure and doesn' t have a problem with being wet and cold for days on end - she just loves the adventure.

I'm even luckier, my admiral thinks it's a gas to get all dressed up and hit the high life in town. She looks great in both an evening gown or in sailing foulies ( just how lucky can a guy get? And no she doesn't have any sisters LOL)
This is my thinking exactly. Although our relationship is new, I am encouraged by her sense of adventure. From her past, she has taken many a risk. Just up and moved to a place she had never been to before. It's rare to find a woman that does that. I think a few men like myself do. And your last paragraph...Yes, my new friend even smells nice...
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Old 14-11-2012, 13:40   #9
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

I think that i am very lucky as well. After more or less giving up on the idea of another lady in my life, three years ago i met a lady who was married, seemingly happy, but something clicked between us and we both took a huge gamble, she more than myself i may say. She upped and left and came to live with me. She is a woman that loves camping, has done many desert trips in 4x4's and basically loves being outside. Then i took her for a sail on a friends boat, a totally new experience for her, and she was hooked. We now have two small sailboats and not sure if she will ever decide to not have a home, but she certainly wants to spend more time sailing when circumstances permit.

So yes, look for the adventurous type. Stay away from the candy floss ladies, but most importantly, don't give up, i am 63 now and she is 53, and we both say ,and mean it, that we have never been happier. It may be late, but it is not too late.

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Old 14-11-2012, 14:02   #10
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

My dream of liveaboard cruising started when I was twelve and long before dreams of women. When I met my wife in college she was navigating a Kawasaki and as comfortable spelunking as in high heels or white water canoeing. She can smoothly pilot our 26,000 pound ketch into all angles of docks in a variety of wind and current. She had never been sailing when we met, but she's been living aboard and cruising with me for over forty years. I don't race, but she has captained all female crews to some wins. She made it easy raising our two children on a 33' boat until they were 7 & 9 and on through their teens on a larger boat. I knew she was right when I saw her pack for a two week trip in a small backpack.
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Old 14-11-2012, 14:10   #11
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

I always wonder why in these discussions it is assumed that men and women want different things as far as boating and sailing go!

Don't you just look for a person who has the same likes and interests as you do in a life partner?

I started a thread years ago about "What do women want" far as a boat. It turned out they wanted the same things on the boat that I wanted!

I guess the only women related thing on my boat that I would like is one that talked less or at least warned me when I was suppose to be listening for real! But that really isn't a boat related thing is it?
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Old 14-11-2012, 14:21   #12
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

Well, I'm not sure about the perfect woman......

But I'm going to implement a Bra boycott on my boat.

Not sure how the spouse will go for that though.

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Old 14-11-2012, 14:22   #13
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

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But that really isn't a boat related thing is it?
Only if she throws you overboard (intentional gybe , etc.)
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Old 14-11-2012, 15:12   #14
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

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Only if she throws you overboard (intentional gybe , etc.)
It's not like he doesn't have it coming!
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Old 14-11-2012, 15:36   #15
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Re: "What make the perfect boat woman...perfect"

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It's not like he doesn't have it coming!

Wait! What! ................ was I suppose to be listening?

When I'm reading or watching something how am I suppose to know that out of the wild blue sea that suddenly someone is speaking to me? I'm willing to listen, with reasonable warning!

Now I know the answer my daughter always gives me "men are always suppose to be listening in case a women speaks"! Come on now that is just so always (except for my wife who tries to use up her daily word ration elsewhere)!

Now back to boats! How about about a blue little that signals women about to speak? Needs to be low power consumption LED.

Now women before you get all wound up, remember I am one of few guys that admits I like the same stuff on my boat overall that you do!
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