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Finns · 27-04-2016, 15:10

Hi everyone,

I could use some advice! I find myself a newly single woman at 37 years old. I have always loved the water (grew up in the prairies but drawn to the west coast). I remember spending time on my uncle's boat as a 12 year old and thinking 'I wish I could just live here forever'. That little thought stuck in the back of my head and from then on, I've tried to convince past boyfriends, then my husband that we should pursue the idea and learn what we needed to learn in order to get out there. That was never anyone else's thing though, so I let it go. Now that my husband and I have split up, I find myself wondering what to do with the rest of my days, and this is top of the list. I have zero experience and no unfortunately no partner (at the moment) to share this life with, but I would love to hear any and all suggestions as to how I can work towards this goal.

I have read bits and pieces online (forums and blogs) and in books over the years, but most of what I've read is about the day to day life. I know this would not be an easy way to live, and I'm good with that. Fulfilling is what I'm after. While I am not in a place at this time to actually purchase a boat, I will be coming into some money in the next year or two, so I'd like to start planning now. I just don't know the first step in getting there. Right now I live in Eastern Washington, if that helps.

I'm sure I sound like a naive dreamer, and at this point, that's ok with me. I would like to turn into a well informed dreamer though.

Thanks in advance for any advice!

scuba0_1 · 27-04-2016, 15:16

Step 1 find your sailing club and go sailing with some one.

Sent from my SM-N910V using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app

Fmspeed · 27-04-2016, 15:24

I've run into the exact same thing.
But decided one day to buy a little boat, buy a book, lol and go sail.

Three boats later , and getting very close to making a run from everyday life. But finding someone who would actually set their phone down for 15 min. Seems to be getting further away as i get closer to the dream.

jeepbluetj · 27-04-2016, 15:30

Ditto sailing club. Or take lessons. Sometimes you can find a meetup group. (I've had quite a few meetup foks on my boat]

goat · 27-04-2016, 15:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by Finns

Hi everyone,

I could use some advice! I find myself a newly single woman at 37 years old. I have always loved the water (grew up in the prairies but drawn to the west coast). I remember spending time on my uncle's boat as a 12 year old and thinking 'I wish I could just live here forever'. That little thought stuck in the back of my head and from then on, I've tried to convince past boyfriends, then my husband that we should pursue the idea and learn what we needed to learn in order to get out there. That was never anyone else's thing though, so I let it go. Now that my husband and I have split up, I find myself wondering what to do with the rest of my days, and this is top of the list. I have zero experience and no unfortunately no partner (at the moment) to share this life with, but I would love to hear any and all suggestions as to how I can work towards this goal.

I have read bits and pieces online (forums and blogs) and in books over the years, but most of what I've read is about the day to day life. I know this would not be an easy way to live, and I'm good with that. Fulfilling is what I'm after. While I am not in a place at this time to actually purchase a boat, I will be coming into some money in the next year or two, so I'd like to start planning now. I just don't know the first step in getting there. Right now I live in Eastern Washington, if that helps.

I'm sure I sound like a naive dreamer, and at this point, that's ok with me. I would like to turn into a well informed dreamer though.

Thanks in advance for any advice!

First off, try and find out who you are, don't rush in to the next one too quickly, being single has a lot of perks. Secondly, why wouldn't you follow your dream?

Finns · 27-04-2016, 15:49

You're right. I do want to stay single for a while to force myself to focus on myself. An ex once said that compromise was bs, that it just made both parties unhappy. He believed that whoever felt most strongly about the issue should get their way. Guess who always got their way? :P I'm more of a go with the flow kinda girl.

I guess I also never pursued it seriously because the idea of making such a huge change is pretty scary to go through alone. I'm still scared, but I'm just going to do it anyway! Even by myself, cracking open a beer at the end of a hard day will be pretty damn satisfying when I'm working toward my dream.

On The Water · 27-04-2016, 16:20

Your uncle's boat, was it wooden?
Just saying, you could purchase a small wooden boat and have it delivered where you reside, keep it up as to say, you decide on the boat, be it a row boat , day sailor or something other, something small tho maybe under 24 feet, just as a hobby for now.

Dono, you write so softly , this might come out a bit harsh.

Finns · 27-04-2016, 16:35

I was only about 12 so I don't remember a ton about the boat but it was a power boat that was about 45' if I recall correctly. He took our family out in the San Juans and we just puttered around for a week or so, exploring the area and taking the dinghy to check out hiking trails, etc.

robwilk37 · 27-04-2016, 16:41

move to the coast, get into racing. boats are always looking for newb crew. listen and learn, volunteer to help with maintenance and repair. you dont have to care about racing, but it is a fast track education and someone else has all the expense. also gets you used to making quick decisions, staying cool under pressure, precise boat handling, situational awareness etc. if you can sit on the rail soaking wet and cold and still love being there, then the life aboard is definitely for you.

barnakiel · 27-04-2016, 16:46

It is not unfortunately. It is fortunately.

It is more difficult when there is a partner because one can wrongly take their partner's dream for their own.

As long as you can tell the difference between a new partner and a new life, you are fine.

As for the hard core of your question, the answer is straightforward: the way from dreaming to reality is by acting.

Do not over-worry the hows and the apparent difficulty. Simply buy a boat you like in a place you like and start living in it. You may like cruising too, it is only one step up from living onboard. Then you may like sailing too, it is only one step up from cruising.

Take care, stick to your guns, dream, act, live.

Cheers,
b.

**Don C L** · 27-04-2016, 17:15

Hmmm eastern WA, is that Coeur d'Alene or Pullman? You could get a nice little boat to learn on in Coeur d'Alene or if you are south you may have some luck down at Snake Lake, Lewiston/Clarkston. In my younger days I was a guide every summer on the Snake and Salmon down there so it is like a second home, that I miss very much. Wind is not very predictable for your area though. Are you thinking of heading straight west to Puget Sound? I am not sure, do you know how to sail yet or still getting ready to? Are you dreaming of a big boat to live around the world on, or cruise coastally, as in Puget Sound, or something else. DO NOT worry about sounding like a naive dreamer around here... come on, we are a little nuts here, aren't we? Maybe I'll just speak for myself. AND by the way "the rest of your days" at 37? Wow, That is a LOT of days!! Good that you are starting early. I got 20 years on ya and I think I may have 20 or so left of sailing. A few more details on your dreaming will help us in the advice column...

Finns · 27-04-2016, 17:30

Haha! I guess "rest of my days" sounds a bit dramatic! I just meant that I fully expected to have stayed married to my ex and living out a different path. Now I find myself at loose ends trying to figure out how I want to spend my life. Instead of just working and paying my mortgage and saving bits and pieces to get to vacation occasionally.

I do not know how to sail at all yet. I just love the ocean. I actually teared up when I had to leave the last time I visited Ruby Beach on the Olympic Peninsula. I would love to work my way up to traveling around the world.

On The Water · 27-04-2016, 17:33

A boat helps

Tayana42 · 27-04-2016, 17:44

Barnakel gave you the best advice I've read in a long time. Dream, decide what you want, then take action.

I think it was Einstein who said something like, "everyone has flashes of genius, the geniuses are the ones who recognize the flashes and act on them."

S/V B'Shert