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Old 26-01-2015, 12:43   #256
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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Originally Posted by jwing View Post
.... "the American society" should celebrate a divorce for people who do not have children under the age of 18.

... "the American society" should not be pressuring them to stay married.
How is this related to nationality?
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Old 26-01-2015, 13:21   #257
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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How is this related to nationality?
Nothing, as far as I'm concerned. Some people think differently.

Read 198, 199, and 203 through 206.
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Old 26-01-2015, 13:47   #258
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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Sounds rational, but sorry I have been on a trawler in 30-40 foot seas on the Grand Banks during a hurricane. The boat did what it was designed and built to do! It came through the storm. Did I love it? No! I appreciated the fact it performed as was intended, it was a good stout vessel. Perhaps my reluctance to use the word love is semantic, but to me it is only used on living things. Call me old fashioned, "and old"
No wonder, nobody loves a trawler
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Old 26-01-2015, 13:48   #259
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

For some reason I find myself without a lot of support for my pragmatic thinking,
I can't anthropomorphize or find human characterization in inanimate objects. Boats or other non-living objects cant have a soul, they cant reach out and protect their occupants, they provide shelter and protection as a function of their design and construction, not because they are caring. Sorry but this is enough B.S. philosophy, back to materialistic pragmatism.
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Old 26-01-2015, 14:01   #260
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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For some reason I find myself without a lot of support for my pragmatic thinking,
I can't anthropomorphize or find human characterization in inanimate objects. Boats or other non-living objects cant have a soul, they cant reach out and protect their occupants, they provide shelter and protection as a function of their design and construction, not because they are caring. Sorry but this is enough B.S. philosophy, back to materialistic pragmatism.
You are describing an ordinary production boat,. not a one it's owner has repaired and mainteined With his love.-- which is where the real problem lies, the spouse has turned into snowwhites stepmother becouse of jelousy.

My take for the PO: 1#Set the boat price so high it's unlikely to find new owner. 2#Get the the spouse to beauty shops and to plastic surgery if needed untill someone else will take her for free. 3#Go sailing
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Old 26-01-2015, 14:09   #261
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We sold our boat about 3 years ago-but the decision was not mutual. I loved to sail and loved our boat. She got us through storms and to beautiful sunsets. I can't explain why I love an inanimate object. I'm pretty logical except for this boat thing. Maybe we love what brings us pleasure-what gets the endorphins flowing. Or maybe it is from a past life I never saw an ocean or sailed until my 40's. OP~I hope however this works out for you, and you end up happy. Gloria
Perhaps it's not the object itself; rather, the opportunities it provides. Moreover, the boat may represent ideas and values, such as, freedom, nature, and adventure. Such thoughts about a boat causes one to see a boat as more than a boat and does explain some of the reasons why folks love boats.

I think you said it well in your post.
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Old 26-01-2015, 14:43   #262
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

Teddydriver
Sorry but I simply cant share your point of view. I have been at sea over 50 years, many times in severe conditions always in boats I have put my heart and soul into, from simple re-fits to total refurbs, and most recently an abandoned derilect that my wife and I completely rebuilt from trash to a treasure. I still dont love it. I like it when I'm done working on it and looking forward to sailing it. But that said, I could sell it tomorrow and not even look back. Sorry, I cant get emotional about a thing!
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Old 26-01-2015, 14:45   #263
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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...I can't anthropomorphize or find human characterization in inanimate objects. Boats or other non-living objects cant have a soul...
It has been said that fiberglass boats have a polyester soul. But I'm sure that was to differentiate it with the soul of a wooden boat, most heavily imbued with the spirits of its builders, by their own skilled hands. A peculiar quality exuded by a masterfully handcrafted work of the builders' art.

OTH, many have a tin ear for music. And many more have not yet learned how to let that special music move them in a way that can only be called love.
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Old 26-01-2015, 14:48   #264
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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Sorry, I cant get emotional about a thing!
No worries, me neither. But I understand if someone does
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Old 26-01-2015, 15:27   #265
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

Whilst in Hawaii, I worked for a private mental health organization. I have a background in human behavior. Must be why I ended up as a Toolmaker. We had clients who were bi-polar and were incapable of feeling love in relationships. I'm not sure if all of them were like that but the ones I met were.
Maybe it's the same with boats, relationships or anything for that matter.
People can go through life and never be diagnosed as such.
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Old 26-01-2015, 15:32   #266
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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Sounds rational, but sorry I have been on a trawler in 30-40 foot seas on the Grand Banks during a hurricane. The boat did what it was designed and built to do! It came through the storm. Did I love it? No! I appreciated the fact it performed as was intended, it was a good stout vessel. Perhaps my reluctance to use the word love is semantic, but to me it is only used on living things. Call me old fashioned, "and old"
And why would you be out in a hurricane? With all of the technology we have today, you pretty much, have to try hard to get caught up in one.
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Old 26-01-2015, 16:18   #267
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

Much of this is away from the original posting. No matter how much you love something, boats or whatever, in a relationship what you spend time with is interpreted as what you love. It is not just money, but a lot of time is spent making anything "bristol." I can't blame anyone for being upset if their partner is absent while pursuing a hobby, albeit a passionate one. I think I can say there are certain boats I like, and a few I "love," but if I am neglecting my wife, or if she feels I am neglecting her, then the onus is on me to help set things right. BTW the "love" I feel for an inanimate object is more an appreciation for all that it can do and how well it can do it. I used to "love" my old Citroen ID19 (anybody know those cars?), but I didn't cry when it was gone.
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Old 26-01-2015, 16:56   #268
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

NT I think you should put your wife on the phone here. there are two sides to every story. To try to counsel with only half of the story never works. I think if we would hear from her and see the whole picture, we could provide the free counseling that would soon have you both moving in a more positive direction. C'mon put her on the phone!
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Old 26-01-2015, 19:28   #269
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

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And why would you be out in a hurricane? With all of the technology we have today, you pretty much, have to try hard to get caught up in one.
Not a bad point but the year We were caught in that hurricane on our fishing boat was in the early sixties, its so long ago I can't quite remember what year it was. In those days you found out there was a hurricane When it hit you.
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Old 26-01-2015, 22:05   #270
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Re: Spouse hates my boat

lesterbutch:

I support your position.
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