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Old 18-09-2011, 21:41   #391
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

Dude....that is so 80's
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Old 18-09-2011, 22:26   #392
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Dude....that is so 80's
Yes, I agree. Being gracious and gentlemanly is out of style today.
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Old 19-09-2011, 06:13   #393
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

Arg,,,, I have never had a Pirate flag but I will soon get one just to poke some of these responders in the "aye"

"Aye matey...Nuke the unborn gay baby pirate whales"
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Old 19-09-2011, 06:39   #394
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

If and when you actually do get out there as a long term cruiser, you will notice - maybe - that the groups of sailors with the "pirate" flags, hats, etc. tend to be hard party, loud and wild and usually new or charterboat type folks.
- - You will notice that the "old-timers" are generally much slower, easy going, and more connected to the environment and prefer a more gentle form of living.
- - There is nothing "wrong" with either group per se, but they generally do not mix well in a small anchorage. So it is wise to keep the two groups geographically separated a bit so that each can enjoy their lifestyles without grating on each other.
- - One of the main purposes of cruising is to get away from folks and lifestyles that you do not prefer and it is only good common sense to not force your presence upon the others. There is plenty of water out there for both types to enjoy.
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Old 19-09-2011, 08:09   #395
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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I've traveled in over twenty countries. If those people don't like Americans, they are very good at hiding that feeling in my presence.
Second that. We have travelled to more than 50 countries all over the world and, every year, live for three or four months each in the Bahamas and in France. We have been doing this for over ten years and have rarely been treated badly. Quite the contrary. Most people go out of their way to be pleasant. When you get down to it what they don't like is the way our government behaves. It's notable that, in general, they also don't like the way their governments behave.

Europeans in particular are not as open as we are here in the US. We once met a Dutch couple in a restaurant and invited them back to our apartment for a drink. They told us a European would never do that unless they had come to know you well. We expect everyone to be as casual about personal relationships as we are. When that doesn't happen, we see it as unfriendly. The reality is thay would be equally "unfriendly" to a fellow European.

The really staggering revelation, for us, is that probably the most open and friendliest people we have met are in the Muslim countries that "hate us".

Dick Pluta
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Old 19-09-2011, 08:15   #396
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

Thank you for the sentiment, Domenic, though it wouldn't much matter what words were used - I respect and love my husband dearly and there's no comment anyone could make that would stand a chance at changing that.

Similarly, and since this is an odd situation and one I'm a little uncomfortable in, please forgive me if this doesn't come out perfectly, but I think it would be for the best if members here (who are trying to be friendly?) don't insult my husband. Like I said, I am very much in love with him and, on top of that, he is also a member of this board as we created this username and account jointly. I don't think any of the female members here would openly insult any of the male members' wives, and so I would appreciate the same courtesy, regardless of what your personal opinions are.

I joked around in response to the comments on the thread yesterday as, frankly, I wasn't quite sure what to say and humour tends to be my default reaction mode to most situations, including uncomfortable ones. I apologize if this lent any appearance of condoning on my part, but that's not the case.

Anyway, I didn't want this to turn into some 'big thing'....just wanted to ask for folks to please refrain from personally insulting someone they know nothing about. Hopefully we can return to normal operations now?
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Old 19-09-2011, 08:55   #397
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Originally Posted by Dick Pluta View Post

Europeans in particular are not as open as we are here in the US. We once met a Dutch couple in a restaurant and invited them back to our apartment for a drink. They told us a European would never do that unless they had come to know you well. We expect everyone to be as casual about personal relationships as we are. AEGEA

Thing is Dick, you gotta always be asking yerself, 'What does this look like to a stranger'
Neighbours might think you got some swinging fun going on if you keep coming home with a new couple each time you pop out for a pint.
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Old 19-09-2011, 09:38   #398
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Thank you for the sentiment, Domenic, though it wouldn't much matter what words were used - I respect and love my husband dearly and there's no comment anyone could make that would stand a chance at changing that.

Similarly, and since this is an odd situation and one I'm a little uncomfortable in, please forgive me if this doesn't come out perfectly, but I think it would be for the best if members here (who are trying to be friendly?) don't insult my husband. Like I said, I am very much in love with him and, on top of that, he is also a member of this board as we created this username and account jointly. I don't think any of the female members here would openly insult any of the male members' wives, and so I would appreciate the same courtesy, regardless of what your personal opinions are.

I joked around in response to the comments on the thread yesterday as, frankly, I wasn't quite sure what to say and humour tends to be my default reaction mode to most situations, including uncomfortable ones. I apologize if this lent any appearance of condoning on my part, but that's not the case.

Anyway, I didn't want this to turn into some 'big thing'....just wanted to ask for folks to please refrain from personally insulting someone they know nothing about. Hopefully we can return to normal operations now?
I'm glad you read my post before it was removed...I know many boaters in the real world...most are adult in their treatment of others.
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Old 19-09-2011, 10:38   #399
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Originally Posted by Dick Pluta View Post
Second that. We have travelled to more than 50 countries all over the world and, every year, live for three or four months each in the Bahamas and in France. We have been doing this for over ten years and have rarely been treated badly. Quite the contrary. Most people go out of their way to be pleasant. When you get down to it what they don't like is the way our government behaves. It's notable that, in general, they also don't like the way their governments behave.

Europeans in particular are not as open as we are here in the US. We once met a Dutch couple in a restaurant and invited them back to our apartment for a drink. They told us a European would never do that unless they had come to know you well. We expect everyone to be as casual about personal relationships as we are. When that doesn't happen, we see it as unfriendly. The reality is thay would be equally "unfriendly" to a fellow European.

The really staggering revelation, for us, is that probably the most open and friendliest people we have met are in the Muslim countries that "hate us".

Dick Pluta
AEGEA
I guess it depends on who you are as I have never met a stranger..The Europeans I have known were all ways welcoming except the ones in Poland right after the wall fell.(cant blame them)but even they came around after a while...DVC
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Old 19-09-2011, 10:41   #400
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Originally Posted by nosinglesource View Post
Thank you for the sentiment, Domenic, though it wouldn't much matter what words were used - I respect and love my husband dearly and there's no comment anyone could make that would stand a chance at changing that.

Similarly, and since this is an odd situation and one I'm a little uncomfortable in, please forgive me if this doesn't come out perfectly, but I think it would be for the best if members here (who are trying to be friendly?) don't insult my husband. Like I said, I am very much in love with him and, on top of that, he is also a member of this board as we created this username and account jointly. I don't think any of the female members here would openly insult any of the male members' wives, and so I would appreciate the same courtesy, regardless of what your personal opinions are.

I joked around in response to the comments on the thread yesterday as, frankly, I wasn't quite sure what to say and humour tends to be my default reaction mode to most situations, including uncomfortable ones. I apologize if this lent any appearance of condoning on my part, but that's not the case.

Anyway, I didn't want this to turn into some 'big thing'....just wanted to ask for folks to please refrain from personally insulting someone they know nothing about. Hopefully we can return to normal operations now?
Im sure that guy meant no harm..was a roundabout way to a compliment..I think..
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Old 19-09-2011, 10:54   #401
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

Just to clarify a few things for those not from the PNW. We have a long tradition here of a celebration called SeaFair. It occurs every year in August. SeaFair pirates have always been a part of the tradition. SeaFair itself has been rendered "family friendly". That means that the party and it's attendant hydroplane races, pirate invasions, torchlight parades and general rowdy behavior have been curtailed in favor of activities approved by Volvo driving young mothers. In the past it was more like what the crews on the "Most Dangerous Catch" might do....no more.

The flying of the Jolly Roger here is an ode to the old (better) days when Hydroplane races were real and the first 707 was barrel rolled above the crowd. I do not fly the flag myself, I also do not drive a Volvo so I am somewhat in between the extremes. It's a cultural tradition here and non political.

Todd
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Old 19-09-2011, 10:58   #402
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Im sure that guy meant no harm..was a roundabout way to a compliment..I think..
I hear you, Tropical, and I also tend to be of the mind that there was no maliciousness (and so, bygones), but I do have to draw the line at making personal remarks about the appearance of my husband.

It may very well be that he was just kidding around. As I said in another post, the typed word is easy to misconstrue...there is no body language, no facial gestures, no inflection, which makes it difficult to decipher. For this reason I contemplated for a bit before posting what I did. BUT, in retrospect, I'm comfortable that I did as I would rather find that I was wrong and receive some different information, than to (through my silence) give at all the impression that I condone negative, personal remarks toward my husband in a public forum.

There are folks who can make those sorts of comments to us. Hypocritical? Maybe, but we all know each other very well and the joking-around nature of anything said is obvious to us. When it's from someone on a relatively anonymous (because really, you can think you know someone online, but the fact is they can be passing themselves off as whoever they want to be) forum, and you don't really know the person, it just doesn't seem right...you know?

Aaanyway, now that I've used up more than my quota of bandwidth on this topic alone, let alone others, maybe I'll bow out of here for now. DH is coming home from a fishing trip early today and I want to be sure to get to the airport early!
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Old 19-09-2011, 11:09   #403
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Thing is Dick, you gotta always be asking yerself, 'What does this look like to a stranger'
Neighbours might think you got some swinging fun going on if you keep coming home with a new couple each time you pop out for a pint.
The point of my comment was exactly that. Personally, I get that completely. In the past 10 years we have lived, full time, in Paris for a total of about 4 years. We understand the social dynamics. I was looking at the situation through American eyes. In the US that kind of behavior would be strictly OK. You meet some people, you click and you open a preliminary relationship to explore the possibility of new friends. In my experience, that just doesn't happen in Europe. It takes a lot longer ot get to the "maybe you could be my friend" stage. An American sees that behavior and thinks "What a bunch of stuck up SOBs". I find it interesting that the French typically describe Americans as "decontracte". The best I can do in translating is "casually informal".

Dick
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Old 19-09-2011, 11:13   #404
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Originally Posted by nosinglesource View Post
Similarly, and since this is an odd situation and one I'm a little uncomfortable in, please forgive me if this doesn't come out perfectly, but I think it would be for the best if members here (who are trying to be friendly?) don't insult my husband. Like I said, I am very much in love with him and, on top of that, he is also a member of this board as we created this username and account jointly. I don't think any of the female members here would openly insult any of the male members' wives, and so I would appreciate the same courtesy, regardless of what your personal opinions are.

I joked around in response to the comments on the thread yesterday as, frankly, I wasn't quite sure what to say and humour tends to be my default reaction mode to most situations, including uncomfortable ones. I apologize if this lent any appearance of condoning on my part, but that's not the case.

Anyway, I didn't want this to turn into some 'big thing'....just wanted to ask for folks to please refrain from personally insulting someone they know nothing about. Hopefully we can return to normal operations now?
Here’s some well meant advice for you:

1. If you are sensitive about your or your husband’s appearance, don’t post your pictures on the Internet. Otherwise it’s an invitation to commentary, sometimes flattering, sometimes not. As an example, recently one poster here called another poster and his wife “two obese gringos” because of their photo in the avatar. Apparently realizing that the photo was an irritant and an invitation to unflattering commentary, that poster instantly changed the avatar to a more neutral photo. Without getting huffy or indignant.

2. Do not bring your family members into a discussion on the Internet. The etiquette of Internet prohibits the discussion of one’s family members - unless you YOURSELF drag them into the debate. Once that happens, the inviolate hands-off rule becomes void and they become fair game. You should always post for yourself, and only yourself, and let the others post for themselves. On the Internet, it doesn’t matter what you look like, how much money you have, what schools you went to, how successful you are in your business – the only thing that counts is the quality of posting. You are only as good as your last post.

3. When I playfully attempted to compliment you on your looks (because YOU had posted your picture), I faced the real possibility that I was in fact dealing with the other person in the photo, not you. It could have been somewhat embarrassing if that poster had replied “Hey, I am a dude, do you still think I am cute?” (or something along those lines.) So the remark I made was absolutely not meant as an insult, but was a rather humorous way (followed by the huge GRIN emoticon, just in case) of precluding the potentially uncomfortable situation that I might be dealing with another guy. You see, most guys tend to refrain from paying each other compliments on their looks, but rather jocularly disparage them. If you still don’t understand, maybe that’s because it’s a guy thing.

4. However, if you or your husband are so sensitive about your looks that you cannot tolerate playful banter, rest assured assured I will provide no further commentary on your respective appearances.

Hope that helps.
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Old 19-09-2011, 11:19   #405
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Re: Jolly Roger, Pirates and Political Correctness

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Once that happens, the inviolate hands-off rule becomes void and they become fair game.
To be perfectly clear they are not fair game on Cruiser's Forum and rudeness of any type if reported or spotted by a moderator will be dealt with.

Humour is sometimes difficult to translate culturally and visually in a international written medium so sometimes what appears as a joke to one person will be insulting to another. If your sense of humour is of a type that walks a fine line it's best to keep it to yourself.
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