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Old 05-02-2015, 19:51   #46
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

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Originally Posted by Cadence View Post
Good advice Dr. Phil! I wasn't quite sure on the needy on the OP?

???

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Old 05-02-2015, 19:54   #47
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

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Originally Posted by FSMike View Post
LOL. My first thought was that if I had a chain break on my sink drain plug I would promptly throw the chain away so I would never have to fix it again.
It's a shame that attitude won't work with anchor chains.

Does anybody know how to put this into Latin?
"Don't let the maintenance wear you down".
That would make a good sailor's t-shirt.

Hi Mike,

The chain did break again and I did throw it away, lol! Thanks for the good advice about maintenance, I am taking it to heart and you are right it would make a great t-shirt!

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Old 05-02-2015, 20:03   #48
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

Thank you everyone for taking the time to read my whinny post and offer support, you do not know how much it means to me! Everyone has an off day, yesterday was mine. The worst of the maintenance was the first month after we got back after leaving Smart Move on the hard for five months. Once we got moving (about a month ago) things got much better. What triggered the post was a phone call to my daughter who wants us home. For me, writing things helps me analyze things and sort through the important parts/issues, you all have help me sort through what is important and I hope that I have explained it well in my responses. Thanks for keeping me grounded!

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Old 06-02-2015, 18:11   #49
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

I haven't reached the sophomore stage yet (mind you I'm Australian so don't even use that word), but I tend to think of enjoying sailing life in terms of an equation. It goes something like this:

enjoyable memories+diverse environments+peace and quiet+overcoming challenges+ drinks on deck watching the sun set - things breaking-maintenance-covering costs = happy sailing

If this equation is out of balance and you start having negative values for the happy sailing, then you have to add more into the variables on the positive side.

Simple really :roll eyes:

H
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Old 06-02-2015, 19:09   #50
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

Robyn, last year I replaced the water heater and all the plumbing hoses, hot & cold, and installed new galley sinks drains.

I took a cruise in June. The weather was gorgeous.

I heard the dreaded water pump blues (running all the time) as I neared a friend's harbor.

He wasn't there, but there was an empty slip with a water hose. Heaven.

I took apart the galley (required the removal of the microwave, and its wooden frame). One of the new hoses had pulled loose. Fixed, took about an hour, filled the water tanks.

Just before I cast off I washed my hands. Drip, drip,drip... The hose to the new sink drains came off!!! Back again to take things apart, replace the sink drain hose.

All back together again, took off.

Did I mention it was 102F?!?

Found a great new-to-me anchorage and had a wonderful rest of the trip.

Until the alternator started sparking after the engine overheated because of grass in the strainer.

I STILL had a wonderful time.
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Old 06-02-2015, 21:26   #51
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

I know what you mean about the sophomore blues... You do most/all of the work on the list, and you're feeling good about it and think you're through that phase, and something else breaks, or something that you already fixed breaks. It can be pretty frustrating, as you think to yourself "that's not fair, I already dealt with that!", or "I just want a break from these problems!"

Such is the nature of life. There is no fair. And even if you get through your list, there's the yearly maintenance.

Just rest assured that what you've done HAS made your boat better, that you have made some progress, and your skills have advanced since last year.

Yes, the sophomore blues are normal.
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Old 07-02-2015, 02:04   #52
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

Smart Move,

So sorry it has been difficult!

I found a time after I had quit work and before I had a firm identity as a cruising sailor, that I felt kinda down, and for me, it was due to a lack of external validation, as I had hand on land; i.e. I worked, was paid a salary,was valued. Quit that, and what validation did I have? Well, Jim liked me, but was that enough? I think this can be a problem for women that men mainly don't encounter, because they segue from wage earner to ships captain. Okay, where's your self-confidence and maybe even pride come from?

Hope this leads you in a useful direction.

Ann
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Old 07-02-2015, 03:47   #53
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

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Re guilt tripping from kids:

Try a thought experiment:

If you were suddenly incapacitated and required full time care, would your children step up and take on those duties, even if it meant giving up all their activities and dreams for themselves? Perhaps, but many would not. And that is what the guilt trippers are asking of you...

Chances are that you gave up much of your personal life for twenty odd years to launch your kids into adulthood... maybe even more. You have paid your dues and you get to have a life too. By all means, continue to be supportive to your kids... but this does not mean physical attendance, nor even financial support... rather, emotional support and perhaps advice on this or that. It doesn't include 24/7 babysitting!

You only have an unknown number of years left. Use them wisely!

Jim
Well said!
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Old 07-02-2015, 05:08   #54
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

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Originally Posted by FSMike View Post
LOL. My first thought was that if I had a chain break on my sink drain plug I would promptly throw the chain away so I would never have to fix it again.
It's a shame that attitude won't work with anchor chains.

Does anybody know how to put this into Latin?
"Don't let the maintenance wear you down".
That would make a good sailor's t-shirt.
I typed "do not let the maintenance grind you down" into google translate and it came up with this "ne starent carborundum"

A little like a phrase I used to use a lot "nil barstardum carborundum" which I thought meant something like don't let the barstards grind you down.

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Old 07-02-2015, 05:45   #55
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

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... The other day the chain broke off the plug for the kitchen sink and it was nearly my undoing...
Reminds me of the old George Jones song, “Things Have Gone to Pieces”

Oh, the faucet started
Drippin' in the kitchen
And last night your picture
Fell down from the wall
Today the boss said "Sorry,
I can't use you anymore."
And tonight the light bulb
Went Out in the hall

Things have gone to pieces since you left me
Nothing turns out half-right now it seems
There ain't nothing in my pocket,
But three nickels and a dime
But I'm holding to the pieces of my dream

Somebody threw a baseball
Through my window
And the arm fell off
My fav'rite chair, again
The man called me today and said,
"He'd haul my things away
If I didn't get my payments made by ten."

Things have gone to pieces since you left me
Nothing turns out half-right now it seems
There ain't nothing in my pocket,
But three nickels and a dime
But I'm holding to the pieces of my dream...
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Old 07-02-2015, 06:58   #56
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

Now you've thrown the chain away from off the sink, the next time you roll the boat over you'al lose the plug. Mac
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Old 07-02-2015, 09:06   #57
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Re: Is There Such A Thing As The 'Sophomore Blues' In Cruising?

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My only true concern is to leave my 82 year old dad behind, when we take of this summer. I am sure he wants us to go, but still it is hard. The kids can take care of them selves now for a few years, no worries there.
Can the kids check on the father?
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