Cruisers Forum
 

Go Back   Cruisers & Sailing Forums > Scuttlebutt > Our Community
Cruiser Wiki Click Here to Login
Register Vendors FAQ Community Calendar Today's Posts Log in

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 04-08-2011, 15:06   #16
Moderator Emeritus
 
David M's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Eastern Tennessee
Boat: Research vessel for a university, retired now.
Posts: 10,406
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Do it on a trial basis for a few months. She should not sell or give up her current residence until she is certain she likes life aboard.
__________________
David

Life begins where land ends.
David M is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 15:25   #17
Moderator Emeritus
 
Boracay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Sunshine Coast, Qld, Australia
Boat: CyberYacht 43
Posts: 5,174
Images: 19
Not Stormy Weather?

I've generally taken the opposite tack to that recommended by some posters.

I did expose my beloved to some boats, but generally under "controlled" conditions. I've concentrated on keeping well clear of Stormy Weather.

Boracay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 16:24   #18
Registered User
 
Don1500's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: On Board, just above the water
Boat: Camano Troll 31'
Posts: 1,201
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Khagan1227 View Post
I got married and two months later moved my wife from the east coast to the west coast. Best thing that ever happened to either of us, as itmade two very young "adults" growup fast. While you are not in that situation, it will cut the ties to the "local" family.

I got it the other way when we made "the decision". She told me she was moving on board and going cruising and I could join her if I wanted.

At least I get to help pick the boat out.
That's like my late wife. When I said I wanted a motorcycle she said she did, too. She never drove one before but we crossed the US within 2 years. Also when I said the Dyna glide would do, she said get the Ultra!
__________________
The Nomad Blog Mother, mother ocean, I have heard you call
Everything I know about cruising I learned from Travis McGee - https://theroamingnomad.com
Don1500 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 16:48   #19
Registered User
 
Ocean Girl's Avatar

Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: In transit ( Texas to wherever the wind blows us)
Boat: Pacific Seacraft a Crealock 34
Posts: 4,115
Images: 2
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika
__________________
Mrs. Rain Dog~Ocean Girl
https://raindogps34.wordpress.com
Ocean Girl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 16:58   #20
Moderator Emeritus
 
Hudson Force's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Lived aboard & cruised for 45 years,- now on a chair in my walk-in closet.
Boat: Morgan OI 413 1973 - Aythya
Posts: 8,466
Images: 1
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Don1500 View Post
................She was raised in Idaho and has no idea what living on a boat is like. She thinks of it as living in an RV.
I'd go with this theme! Sure, when you're falling off the crest that's just like the RV doing the same. When you run aground that's just like the RV stuck in the snow. When you're in the big chop that's just like in the RV speeding over all the Walmart speed bumps. ....'just like the RV in Death Valley,.....'just like the RV in the impound lot,......'just like the RV on the Aspen black diamond slope...... I think this can work! Take care and joy, Aythya crew
__________________
Take care and joy, Aythya crew
Hudson Force is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 17:32   #21
Registered User

Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: ontario canada
Boat: grampian 26
Posts: 1,743
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Don1500 View Post
When a woman says she'll follow you anywhere, does that include a boat?

I am dating a woman that expounds undying like for me and wants to spend the rest of her year with me. I don't want to lead her on so I have told her I will be moving on to a boat in the near future and that will be my home. I have invited her to come along. I don't think she believes me because she's still around.We both live on the west coast and I have no inclination of sailing here. I plan to be on the East Coast as soon as my house sells. Her extended family is here, mine isn't. I like her too, but, just as I would be unwilling to get her to come to the boat against her dreams, I will not change my dreams to fit her expectations. How do I find out if she is willing to come because it is what she wants to do and not just because it's what I want to do.

P.S. She was raised in Idaho and has no idea what living on a boat is like. She thinks of it as living in an RV.
It all depends on where the majority of her extended family lives. Most women of a certain age tend to stay close to where the grandchildren are.
perchance is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 17:32   #22
Registered User

Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 125
Go slow, be open.
spostamento nobile is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 17:33   #23
Registered User
 
capttman's Avatar

Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Satellite Beach Florida
Boat: Bruce Roberts 434
Posts: 716
Send a message via Skype™ to capttman
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ocean Girl View Post
It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika

Hmmmmmm lat and long please
__________________
Capttman

"When the bow be in the trees we'll be running out of seas"
capttman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 17:36   #24
Registered User
 
Gadagirl's Avatar

Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 958
Send a message via Skype™ to Gadagirl
Ummm, Communication?

Talk to her. Open and honest. Educate her. She can't very well form an honest opinion if she is ignorant to many of the facts. Ask her questions that you assume she hadn't thought about. She might ask you about things that hadn't occurred to you.

Nice cruises in beautiful destinations are a great "taste" of the life aboard and allows you to see how you synchronize together on a boat.

Books and reading the forums can inspire or bring about doubts. Or a little bit of both. You won't know until she is well informed and can have some opportunities to experience and discuss it with you.

We can throw out opinions and suggestions to you day and night. But the only thing that will count is your gut instinct and her gut instinct and all of the many conversations that transpire.

Talk to her, not us. You'll both be fine either way. Making the (informed) decision together is always the softest and easiest approach.
Gadagirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 19:07   #25
Moderator Emeritus
 
hummingway's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Gabriola Island & Victoria, British Columbia
Boat: Cooper 416 Honeysuckle
Posts: 6,933
Images: 5
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

It's interesting to see the difference in the way women and men answer this. To generalize and with apologies to any who feel poorly characterized, the men answer how they see it, tinged with a certain cynicism and the woman answer how they'd like it, coloured with optimism. It's possible the truth may lie in between.

Don, I think your fear that she's not taking it seriously may be justified and other then remaining true to your dream while offering to include her I don't know what else you can do. Sometimes lines get blurred and then so does your vision of where you're going. You can suddenly dscover you weren't plotting the same course at all and then all the little comprimises seem larger.
__________________
“We are the universe contemplating itself” - Carl Sagan

hummingway is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 19:49   #26
Registered User
 
senormechanico's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2003
Boat: Dragonfly 1000 trimaran
Posts: 7,162
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ocean Girl View Post
It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika
Erika,
I've always said that cruising is like camping, but without the dirt.
__________________
The question is not, "Who will let me?"
The question is,"Who is going to stop me?"


Ayn Rand
senormechanico is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 20:57   #27
Registered User
 
Don1500's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: On Board, just above the water
Boat: Camano Troll 31'
Posts: 1,201
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ocean Girl View Post
It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika
That is my opinion.
Here I am, after talking to my wife, (she's on the mantle), I have come to the conclusion that I don't really want any ties to land, who ever they are.

My problem now is how to dump her without hurting her. The real problem is the other woman, the dancer in Beverly Hills and the sailor in Mobile. What about them? Kathy is here, I can deal with it. But Sonjia and Kim are the real problem.

The Irish colleen in Cape May is fine for a night or two and she might even sail for a week or two. Life is a bitch.
__________________
The Nomad Blog Mother, mother ocean, I have heard you call
Everything I know about cruising I learned from Travis McGee - https://theroamingnomad.com
Don1500 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 21:14   #28
Registered User

Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Texas
Boat: Pearson 323
Posts: 46
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Don, I think you might be in dangerous waters trying to figure out what a woman really wants! But in all seriousness, aside from the mechanics of living on and tending to a boat, does she tend to get motion sickness? That can be a big factor that some people never get over. Might want to take her on some extended sails to see if that is a factor. But she must be a pretty tough gal...she chose you, right?!
StringBimini is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 21:34   #29
Registered User
 
Don1500's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: On Board, just above the water
Boat: Camano Troll 31'
Posts: 1,201
Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

I really think I need to get to the boat, THEN worry about a woman to share my dream with.
__________________
The Nomad Blog Mother, mother ocean, I have heard you call
Everything I know about cruising I learned from Travis McGee - https://theroamingnomad.com
Don1500 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-08-2011, 23:24   #30
Moderator Emeritus
 
Boracay's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Sunshine Coast, Qld, Australia
Boat: CyberYacht 43
Posts: 5,174
Images: 19
Woman first, boat later...

But what if:-
You buy a mono and she'd go if it was a cat?
You buy a traditional older boat, and she'd really like a Beneteau?
You buy a sailboat, and she's thinking power?
You buy a trawler, she's thinking Searay?

Why not take her boat shopping?

A good woman is very time consuming to find. We're talking decades here.

Its not going to get easier if you're living on a boat.
Boracay is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
liveaboard


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Ultimate Liveaboard sailorboy1 Liveaboard's Forum 20 01-08-2011 19:46
Crusing , Passage Making and General Liveaboard Videos fyodor1564 General Sailing Forum 20 30-07-2011 15:33
Decommissioning Fees - Man vs Woman zeehag Our Community 52 02-07-2011 01:30

Advertise Here


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 15:12.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.