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Old 04-08-2011, 16:06   #16
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Do it on a trial basis for a few months. She should not sell or give up her current residence until she is certain she likes life aboard.
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Old 04-08-2011, 16:25   #17
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Not Stormy Weather?

I've generally taken the opposite tack to that recommended by some posters.

I did expose my beloved to some boats, but generally under "controlled" conditions. I've concentrated on keeping well clear of Stormy Weather.

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Old 04-08-2011, 17:24   #18
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

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Originally Posted by Khagan1227 View Post
I got married and two months later moved my wife from the east coast to the west coast. Best thing that ever happened to either of us, as itmade two very young "adults" growup fast. While you are not in that situation, it will cut the ties to the "local" family.

I got it the other way when we made "the decision". She told me she was moving on board and going cruising and I could join her if I wanted.

At least I get to help pick the boat out.
That's like my late wife. When I said I wanted a motorcycle she said she did, too. She never drove one before but we crossed the US within 2 years. Also when I said the Dyna glide would do, she said get the Ultra!
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Old 04-08-2011, 17:48   #19
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika
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Old 04-08-2011, 17:58   #20
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

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................She was raised in Idaho and has no idea what living on a boat is like. She thinks of it as living in an RV.
I'd go with this theme! Sure, when you're falling off the crest that's just like the RV doing the same. When you run aground that's just like the RV stuck in the snow. When you're in the big chop that's just like in the RV speeding over all the Walmart speed bumps. ....'just like the RV in Death Valley,.....'just like the RV in the impound lot,......'just like the RV on the Aspen black diamond slope...... I think this can work! Take care and joy, Aythya crew
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Old 04-08-2011, 18:32   #21
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

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When a woman says she'll follow you anywhere, does that include a boat?

I am dating a woman that expounds undying like for me and wants to spend the rest of her year with me. I don't want to lead her on so I have told her I will be moving on to a boat in the near future and that will be my home. I have invited her to come along. I don't think she believes me because she's still around.We both live on the west coast and I have no inclination of sailing here. I plan to be on the East Coast as soon as my house sells. Her extended family is here, mine isn't. I like her too, but, just as I would be unwilling to get her to come to the boat against her dreams, I will not change my dreams to fit her expectations. How do I find out if she is willing to come because it is what she wants to do and not just because it's what I want to do.

P.S. She was raised in Idaho and has no idea what living on a boat is like. She thinks of it as living in an RV.
It all depends on where the majority of her extended family lives. Most women of a certain age tend to stay close to where the grandchildren are.
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Old 04-08-2011, 18:32   #22
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Go slow, be open.
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Old 04-08-2011, 18:33   #23
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

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It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika

Hmmmmmm lat and long please
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Old 04-08-2011, 18:36   #24
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Ummm, Communication?

Talk to her. Open and honest. Educate her. She can't very well form an honest opinion if she is ignorant to many of the facts. Ask her questions that you assume she hadn't thought about. She might ask you about things that hadn't occurred to you.

Nice cruises in beautiful destinations are a great "taste" of the life aboard and allows you to see how you synchronize together on a boat.

Books and reading the forums can inspire or bring about doubts. Or a little bit of both. You won't know until she is well informed and can have some opportunities to experience and discuss it with you.

We can throw out opinions and suggestions to you day and night. But the only thing that will count is your gut instinct and her gut instinct and all of the many conversations that transpire.

Talk to her, not us. You'll both be fine either way. Making the (informed) decision together is always the softest and easiest approach.
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Old 04-08-2011, 20:07   #25
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

It's interesting to see the difference in the way women and men answer this. To generalize and with apologies to any who feel poorly characterized, the men answer how they see it, tinged with a certain cynicism and the woman answer how they'd like it, coloured with optimism. It's possible the truth may lie in between.

Don, I think your fear that she's not taking it seriously may be justified and other then remaining true to your dream while offering to include her I don't know what else you can do. Sometimes lines get blurred and then so does your vision of where you're going. You can suddenly dscover you weren't plotting the same course at all and then all the little comprimises seem larger.
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Old 04-08-2011, 20:49   #26
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

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It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika
Erika,
I've always said that cruising is like camping, but without the dirt.
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Old 04-08-2011, 21:57   #27
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

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It's really more like civilized camping. I say follow your dreams, if she follows you great, if not, there are plenty of mermaids in the sea :-).
Erika
That is my opinion.
Here I am, after talking to my wife, (she's on the mantle), I have come to the conclusion that I don't really want any ties to land, who ever they are.

My problem now is how to dump her without hurting her. The real problem is the other woman, the dancer in Beverly Hills and the sailor in Mobile. What about them? Kathy is here, I can deal with it. But Sonjia and Kim are the real problem.

The Irish colleen in Cape May is fine for a night or two and she might even sail for a week or two. Life is a bitch.
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Old 04-08-2011, 22:14   #28
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

Don, I think you might be in dangerous waters trying to figure out what a woman really wants! But in all seriousness, aside from the mechanics of living on and tending to a boat, does she tend to get motion sickness? That can be a big factor that some people never get over. Might want to take her on some extended sails to see if that is a factor. But she must be a pretty tough gal...she chose you, right?!
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Old 04-08-2011, 22:34   #29
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Re: How to Explain to a Woman what Liveaboard Means ?

I really think I need to get to the boat, THEN worry about a woman to share my dream with.
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Old 05-08-2011, 00:24   #30
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Woman first, boat later...

But what if:-
You buy a mono and she'd go if it was a cat?
You buy a traditional older boat, and she'd really like a Beneteau?
You buy a sailboat, and she's thinking power?
You buy a trawler, she's thinking Searay?

Why not take her boat shopping?

A good woman is very time consuming to find. We're talking decades here.

Its not going to get easier if you're living on a boat.
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