Cruising - running away from yourself to look for something you already have?

[osirissail]

In a very general way most folks are the products of their environment and are shaped by it to conform to the "norms." They usually never really know "who they are" beyond the labels of parent/employee/etc.
- - Others have a knowledge/feeling of who they are but unfortunately are trapped by their need to exist in their current environment (society). Nearly all their time and energy is consumed "fitting in" and dealing successfully with the "world" that surrounds them.
- - What long term cruising does is remove that confining environment/societal pressures and give the person a chance to explore who they are rather that who they should be.
- - So long term cruising to exotic or distant shores can be a sort of cleansing or stripping off of the shackles that keep who you are from being fully realized or recognized.
- - There are of course, other ways to do the same like some mentioned involving living in the wilderness land areas of the world. But with cruising you don't have to deal with grizzly bears too often.

[Pete R]

If you're going cruising to escape the pressures of society, you'll probably have to quit your job and sell everything you own first. At that point, you can declare mission accomplished and just go sailing for the fun of it.

[MichaelC]

Adventuring is an end in itself. So go. Small open boat outfitted for beach camping and explore locally, or some hideous ultra modern million dollar yacht. [The little boat will give more adventure]. An adventure is where you go do something you do not normally do and get the crap scared out of you. It will probably change you, but so will time. I cannot imagine living fifty years and being the same person I was at the beginning. Not possible for me. As to the Answer, there was a junky tavern on University Avenue in Seattle in the late 60s that had the finest collection of intellectual graffitti ever, anywhere, until a new guy bought the place and painted the walls [and subsequently lost 100% of his customers]. One of those wonderful statements was the 60s classic:

There is no answer, seek it lovingly.

Just go, don't philosophize, have fun and stop when you are no longer having fun. If the mate is intransigent, you must make another decision before you go.

[MichaelC]

BTW, this 'Registered User' label makes me check my pockets for some stuff I haven't touched in forty years. Well, okay, twenty.

[Ahnlaashock]

I did not read the thread, or at least most of it. I read the beginning, and then I thought about it for a few days.
I am disabled, with no income. I dream about a boat and getting away.
Away being the operative. I have a cabin on 70 acres in the woods, 4 miles from the closest blacktop road, that is my fall back escape.
I am always planning and researching how to be self sufficient and how to stay away from populated areas as long as I can. Guess you would say I am not a people person.
The having to learn new languages while meeting new peoples and cultures, sounds like torture to me.
Am I the only one that does not want to meet anyone I don't have to?

[sww914]

No, you're not the only one. I know you, I have several friends that are the same way. One friend only leaves his mountain once a month for food & tobacco. I am more social than that. Not better, just different.

[hellosailor]

"what is my meaning here, on earth
He argues however, that you don't have to travel somewhere far to distant lands to look for it -"

Obviously you haven't read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Universe.

"Everywhere you go, there you are."

[David_Old_Jersey]

Originally Posted by Ahnlaashock

IThe having to learn new languages while meeting new peoples and cultures, sounds like torture to me.
Am I the only one that does not want to meet anyone I don't have to?

Plusses and minuses to the foreign lingo thing. Big plus is that means you don't have to engage with folks, unless you want / need to. Big downside is that can be isolating.....but that very much depends on the person. In addition of course always Expat / Immigrant "communities" to dip into now and again (and then run away from once reminded yourself what you are not missing ).

[Khagan1227]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

Who?

Who will you be?

I am Mark.

Before I went cruising I was Mark. I am still Mark I was always Mark during the cruise.

I am not a better man for having done a circumnavigation. I still have all the faults I had before. I still hate idiots. I still can't abide ratbags. I still get into heated discussions when someone at the bar says something totally stupid.

I am still as weak and pathetic as before I left home.

You are what you have made yourself NOW. A few years at sea will not change you. If you are honest now, you will be honest in 5 years time even if put to begging in the streets of Calcutta.

Sailing is no escape from the hideous you.

So, be a better 'you' now. And when you cruise off into the sunset you will be able to enjoy cruising for what it is. And also you may have had a chance to get comfortable with yourself before you go


Mark <----- the same Mark that set off 3 years ago. But I have more grey hair!

I agree with you 100%, but I learn something about myself everytime I hit the water, and for the most part that makes me a better person (since I TRY to correct the things I don't like about myself).

Just for us Yanks, what the heck is a ratbag?

[Jacko]

Originally Posted by Pete R

If you're going cruising to escape the pressures of society, you'll probably have to quit your job and sell everything you own first. At that point, you can declare mission accomplished and just go sailing for the fun of it.

That is what many of us have done I did it 9 years ago and have no plans to go back to the old ways. I sit here thinking have I changed or did I look for a change "no" but I have changed as I now know how to go slow and what is not done today can always be done another day.
Im sure my body loves the go slow bit Jacko

[WaywardWench]

Originally Posted by osirissail

In a very general way most folks are the products of their environment and are shaped by it to conform to the "norms." They usually never really know "who they are" beyond the labels of parent/employee/etc.
- - Others have a knowledge/feeling of who they are but unfortunately are trapped by their need to exist in their current environment (society). Nearly all their time and energy is consumed "fitting in" and dealing successfully with the "world" that surrounds them.
- - What long term cruising does is remove that confining environment/societal pressures and give the person a chance to explore who they are rather that who they should be.
- - So long term cruising to exotic or distant shores can be a sort of cleansing or stripping off of the shackles that keep who you are from being fully realized or recognized.
- - There are of course, other ways to do the same like some mentioned involving living in the wilderness land areas of the world. But with cruising you don't have to deal with grizzly bears too often.

Good words of knowledge. In my case, I know who I am, but not many others know who I am. I'm not one to talk much about myself, because I rather hear other people's stories. That way, I learn alot about them in a short time. If you don't know yourself, ask your friends or family members. As for cruising....go for the adventure. We are getting ready to go on our boat soon. We have both retired and now selling or giving away our "stuff". We have had our noses to the grindstone for 30 years. It's our time now and we choose the ocean.... cruising. The kids don't like us going, but most can't understand what freedom really means. I like the saying.."Freedom is something the protected will never know".

[cheoah]

Thoughtful responses to a good question. We're all different, I also have lots of friends who don't really like to travel. As a farmer, I've traveled with groups of farmers to other countries and few were as interested in language, food, etc as I was. When in Brazil, I'd strike off on my own, forced to use my portuguese. I had some memorable encounters with people. Some of us just love to travel I guess, but for different reasons. For instance, many travelers go to Costa Rica for eco-tourism. While the varied landscape is awesome, it's the people, the tico families I stayed with, that made it so meaningful.

Vacation is for running away, a change of scenery, new routine, etc. I guess cruising can be an extended vacation. I've not cruised full-time, but the several weeks I go off each year are definitely an escape from my farm responsibilities. Don't get me wrong, I love to farm, but NOT 365 days a year. More like 300.

When I discovered voyaging, I realized I had it all. There is nothing really left to want. The burden of being tied to the farm 7 days a week, working 90 hour weeks, or working in hot, dusty, dangerous conditions is no big deal when you have a good counterpoise, to borrow a term. I actually find myself imagining I'm at the helm during long "watches" on a tractor or combine. Motoring down the ICW feels like work a little to me, I think that's why I started sailing offshore.

I guess another good question is about all the time we spend planning voyages, upgrades, etc. Since we're all here on this forum, I presume I'm not the only one who spends their free time thinking about cruising. What little free time I do have, is often occupied with thoughts of voyaging. My wife rarely thinks about any of this, but loves to accompany me on cruises. She never plans vacations, it's just not how she thinks. She does do all the work to get us on the road/water, but rarely does she day dream about adventures. She'll sometimes get impatient when I bring up a future trip. Your spouse also has another angle on it. I enjoy singlehanding, so when my wife wants to join, she can. When she doesn't, no big deal -- I'll just carry on alone and no pressure on her.

csh

[larryb]

I am not currently living aboard. In the beginning stages of consolidating my life and throwing off all the stuff that gets you rooted, to return to the ocean. My wife and I cruised for two years, I only began, she is finished, thus the consolidation process is complicated. For me living asea on a sailing vessel is a simple, straight forward way to live. Just being on a sailboat leads to travel. There is alot of truth in the immortal words of Janis Joplin, written by Christopherson, "Freedom's just another word, for nothing left to lose." I guess I like building my sand castles near the waters edge, at low tide. The tide is coming in....
Now, bring me that horizon!

[Billy Higgins]

If you spend 5 to 6 years on a 21 foot Vivacity 650, I guarantee you will come back a different person. Before long into this venture, you will notice an inchoate craving for a larger vessel; the longer this festers, the more sure your plans will be for the next boat. Or for a mountain top retreat.

[osirissail]

Originally Posted by larryb

I am not currently living aboard. In the beginning stages of consolidating my life and throwing off all the stuff that gets you rooted, to return to the ocean. My wife and I cruised for two years, I only began, she is finished, thus the consolidation process is complicated. For me living asea on a sailing vessel is a simple, straight forward way to live. Just being on a sailboat leads to travel. There is alot of truth in the immortal words of Janis Joplin, written by Christopherson, "Freedom's just another word, for nothing left to lose." I guess I like building my sand castles near the waters edge, at low tide. The tide is coming in....
Now, bring me that horizon!

I bolded and underlined a sentence that must have a whole volume of story attached to it?