Blow Hards

[jongleur]

Yep. There's at least one on every dock.
There's about 3 or 4 on the dock I frequent.

If you don't see any on your dock, I can
guarantee there's one you're not seeing...

[Hobie_ind]

Originally Posted by TJ D

Our blowhards generally come down the dock and tell us that our boat is totally unsuitable for just the two of us.

Them: 'How many people does it take to sail your boat?'
Us: Just us two, but really only one since we go watch and watch most of the time"
Them: Well, that's fine for daysails, but you could never handle this boat offshore"
Us: " Um, well, we've just doublehanded from California via Panama, and are now in Maine on our way down from Newfoundland"

Then we typically find out they're just beginning to cruise and have never sailed more than 50 miles from home. It happens quite often in our travels. Sort of reminds me of an internet forum I've heard of....

WHAT????? You leave the marina in a boat larger than 40' with just two of you aboard! Shockingly brave. ;-)

[weavis]

Its just people.

I have several patients who regularly diagnose family members illnesses in the surgery. They sit there and inform me of what to look for.

Just people.

[carstenb]

This is a great thread.

But I can tell you that those people who think they know everything really piss off those of us that do!

[s/v Beth]

Originally Posted by carstenb

This is a great thread.

But I can tell you that those people who think they know everything really piss off those of us that do!

Now don't start that - I might have to sail over to the EU to tell you a thing or two!
(not really)
Peace to all blowhards. They seem to irritate me less the farther offshore I get.

[Ribbit]

I like people (a lot) and am very chatty - you never know what you can learn from any and everybody. I loved my job as an importer/exporter and wholesaler/retailer of roofing materials. At the time I was one of the top three people in the World in my knowledge of natural slate, and regularly had calls from people (including architects) looking for advice. Service to my customers was my top priority, and I'd knock out free info and tips to help them if they wanted to do their own roofs (people who had never done any roofing generally produced first class work, and the fully qualified lad we put through College was available to go and show them how to get started with setting the roof out properly, and then how to prepare the slates - sorting for thickness - and start putting the slates down properly). When I bump into old customers in the pub, they always try and buy me a drink, and when I pass their homes I frequently pop in to see how their roof is aging (they get more beautiful as time goes by). As proper copper nails weren't available on the Market, I even had them made to my design and specification, and sold them cheap to encourage their use.

Perhaps my favourite job was as a barman (I pulled my first pint when I was 9 years old, behind the bar of one of my great aunt's pubs (a lot of my great aunts had pubs, their father bought them for them if they wanted one). I suppose it's in the blood, and you have to like people (if you don't like people, the very worst job you can have is being a barman or own a pub - this proved disastrous for a friend whose other half really hated people, and she destroyed his business because he let her near the customers).

I also love travelling all across Europe, on my own, on a motorbike. I'll talk to anybody, and the amount of useless information I know (which frequently turns out to be useful), is truly staggering. I was very ill as a kid, and it gave me a voracious appetite for reading - used to get through an average of over 3 books a day for years and years. I didn't care what the book was about, as long as it wasn't crap (you can tell if a book is crap, by the end of the first chapter).

While I may well appear to be a 'blowhard', I might be the opposite, but similar. 'Blowhards' to me, are very insecure people, but they are very easy to make happy. They don't want to be invisible. My local had one as a regular customer, and he could get a bit violent. Let's call him Ray (because that's his name). He had a great wife too. Keep him happy and you couldn't wish for a nicer bloke. What I would do was this:

As soon as Ray and Mrs Ray came through the door of the pub, I'd shout "Hiya Ray, what are you both having to drink?" His face would light up, he knew he wasn't invisible, and he'd be great social company for the rest of the night (and wouldn't generally let me buy him another drink, he'd keep my glass full if I let him - I didn't take advantage of the opportunity, and that registered with him). But if he walked through the door and nobody said hello, look out.

I have one of those little Ford Ka's (had a great deal on a new one back in June), it's only relevant because of dashboard warning lights. On startup one morning, the airbag warning light came on, along with a message to consult the manual. Manual said take it to dealer for investigation. So off I went.

Called in at the dealers, and went up to Anwen at the service and repair counter, and said "Anwen, the windbag warning light has come on in the Ka, and the manual said to bring the car in. I think I have been talking too much". It took a minute for it to sink in with Anwen, but those around her were creased up.

I have worked for some blowhard bosses in my time, and they can be a real pain, until you realise the easy way to handle them, is to do EXACTLY what they tell you.

The entertainment value, is priceless.

PS It may be becoming clear that my forum name is no accident . . . . .

[Ribbit]

An example of a blowhard boss called Mike.

Had a new Ford Transit I was the driver of. At its first service, the engine oil change had the amount for the bigger engine version put in. On collection, after a couple of miles, it started laying down smoke like a destroyer. Turned round, took it back, surplus oil was drained.

But from then on, it was using almost a litre of 4 stroke oil a week, which was topped up when filling with petrol at the garage we had an account with.

After a few months, Mike notices that there is a lot of oil appearing on the invoice, and calls me into his office.

"What are you doing with all this oil? You are putting it in your motorbike aren't you?"

I said "No, it's due to the overfilling at the first service, and my 750 Kawasaki is a two stroke, and I only use Bel Ray synthetic two stroke in it."

Mike "Well new Transits don't use oil, so I don't want to see any oil on future invoices, ok?"

I used to have every other Saturday off, and lived across from the shop, so would pop in on my day off for a cuppa and a look to see how Monday's work was shaping up (important for seeing where to have lunch on Monday, etc).

So a few weeks later I walk in the shop and shout hello, and Maggie the receptionist is on the phone, and says "He's just come in, do you want to have a word?" and "Mike's on the phone and he isn't very happy and wants a word" - seems Mike and the Senior workshop engineer are out in the Transit on the way to a job.

I pick the phone up and an apoplectic Mike shouts down the phone "When did you last put oil in this Transit? The oil light has come on and there's none on the dipstick!!!!!".

Me "But new Transits don't use oil Mike?"

Deadly silence the other end. Then "Fair point, don't pay any attention to anything I tell you in future".

The new Boss was now broken in (and he became massively supportive of what we were doing as a Branch together, and was a joy to work with from then on).

[Pelagic]

What a GREAT attitude..... I'd definitely buy you a drink!

[Ribbit]

Originally Posted by Pelagic

What a GREAT attitude..... I'd definitely buy you a drink!

You are too kind.

With luck and fair winds, we may yet get to buy each other a drink (I will have my still on board, so you may get to try some of the output from that).

Though I don't drink much (never a good idea if you are a barman, and also if you want to live long as a motorcyclist). Not even enough for optimum health benefit, sad to say.