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Old 13-01-2015, 11:27   #1
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Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Well it seems I posted on someone else's topic with my issue so I'll start a new one. I'm currently struggling with life, I was raised in a mennonite family with private schools and best of everything thanks to my family who are considerably wealthy. In my family you work for everything you have, nothing is handed to you. I was a rebellious POS child, I went against everything and everybody. I ended up being a member of a 1% outlaw motorcycle club for 20 years and somehow got out without being killed. I now teach gang prevention through Christian ministries. Yes I have change my life!! I worked in the construction field and ended up being a project manager on massive jobsites in the billion dollar range, so I was a very respected consultant at the same time I was a notorious biker. I have a wife and 5 children as well as 4 grand children and I'll be 43 years old come this August. My health went down with severe neuropathy in the feet from uncontrolled diabetes which now I have controlled. I left work and went out on disability.... Wow I went from a six digit salary to 4k a month and depleted my savings due to another catastrophic event in my daughters life. She had brain tumors and had no insurance, I ended up paying out of pocket for the surgeries. I own 2 boats... A 42 foot Jefferson and a sea Ray 27 foot cuddy which are now both sold and purchasing a sailboat. I was just diagnosed with throat cancer and it hit me that I've never completed any of my dreams. My 12 year old son and I wanted to cruise the world and see amazing things which we were going to do with the trawler before my life collapsed. Sailing is the only thing I'll be able to afford on a fixed income. I want to complete the dream and adventure with my son before I go, I've always had a calling to sail the islands and beyond since I was a kid, it's a feeling so strong that it's all I do anymore is research and watch videos of single handed sailing. I look at my son and he's so excited but I also see the dis belief in his eyes because so many times in the past due to the motorcycle club his dreams are crushed, yes I know it's me not the club, I made the choice to be involved in that no one else. My entire life I've been a disappointment to everyone, I've started things and never completed them. This time I'm doing it!

I just wanted to give y'all a glimpse of who I really am, I know that God has a plan for me yet and I'm NOT letting him down. The oceans are my home and the destinations are going to be memories my son will never forget, and the work that goes with each passage will be lessons in life for both of us. Please feel free to criticize me or ask questions. My life is an open book.


" We do not remember days, we remember moments"
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Old 13-01-2015, 12:36   #2
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

I do have a few questions for you.

I guess the first is, what experience do you have offshore? How much studying have you done regarding the passages that will be involved? I guess you are comfortable with various weather forecast sources, and will have a way to receive them away from the dock? Do you or your son get seasick?

Are you qualified to home school your 12 year old son? I have seen many cruising boats with children aboard. These always seen to be some special kids in my eyes. Typically very polite, smart, and very comfortable in their environment. Hopefully, you will find a commercial curriculum that will allow your son to continue learning as you cruise. It would be a shame to set him back a couple of years in school, since he will eventually need to return to the classroom.

Maybe a few more questions in my mind, but will stop for now. Best wishes making your dreams and memories come true.

Ralph
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Old 13-01-2015, 12:41   #3
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Do you have the boy's mother's permission?

Do you or the boy have sailing experience?

What kind of sailboat are you looking at purchasing?
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Old 13-01-2015, 13:02   #4
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

My son will be able to do computer school, I've already spoken with the school district and his lessons can be put on discs. His homework can be uploaded or emailed at different ports. They are very willing to work with me on this, he has been home schooled in the past and I'm very familure with the home school programs. Neither of us have sailing experience but plan on taking sailing classes together while outfitting the proposed vessel. Mothers permission..... I'm still married to his mother and she's not for it but said she wouldn't argue over it, we come from a mennonite back ground where men run the family and work the outside, women take care of the kids and do the inside chores, now I've integrated those traditions with today's values. My wife works and I cook, we share chores and daily routines in a 60/40 fashion and when it comes to major decisions the man always leads his family. A lot of people may disagree with this but it's just the way we've always lived. Now I must say I respect my wife and love her to death, oh! Who am I kidding!! I'm scared of my wife! She rules the roost and allows me to think that I do. Lol. Boating experience... I'm pretty comfortable navigating waters and can read charts as well as follow waypoints, I've been in boating since I was a kid. I usually do not get sea sick, now my son does once in awhile and I expect he will when we eventually set sail. I think the other question was what kind of boat am I looking for.... Really I have no idea... I want to be able to sail the islands from Grenada to panama but I want the capability of sailing to Hawaii if I choose to.


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Old 13-01-2015, 13:54   #5
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

I'd suggest starting out with small bites. My hubby and I were getting ready for a world cruise when I was DX with brain tumors. 3years later we have it mostly licked, and have been cursing for the last couple weeks heading for the exhumas, bahamas from Texas. We will play and take one day at a time. If things go really well we may keep going, or we may head for the East coat US. If things don't go well, we will re evaluate.
It is amazing how much beauty is just out the back door, we don't always have to travel half way around the world to find adventure and awe.
Also, don't get a fixer upper(IMO). It is better if you have to buy a bit smaller boat to get good quality and condition. You will spend less time getting ready and more time actually sailing.
Godspeed to your dreams
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Old 13-01-2015, 14:00   #6
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jgoshow1 View Post
I want to be able to sail the islands from Grenada to panama but I want the capability of sailing to Hawaii if I choose to.
I was with you until that part.

If you buy a boat in Florida, and want to make Grenada, read Passages South, by Bruce Van Sant. That may be our next cruise too.

That Morgan on your other thread doesn't look too bad, actually. Keep in mind, you'll probably want to haul out, do a fresh bottom job, inspect the rudder, keel, and thru-hulls. Add some boat bucks for a dinghy, OB, solar panels and controller (plus mounts for the panels), a Honda generator, maybe some new standing and running rigging, and....??? Maybe a life raft and EPIRB?



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Old 13-01-2015, 15:36   #7
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Update!!!!

Wife just agreed that we must follow this dream!!! I'm very happy!!


" We do not remember days, we remember moments"
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Old 13-01-2015, 22:04   #8
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Have fun, hope to see you out there!
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Old 13-01-2015, 22:34   #9
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Go now coastal cruising is a lot of fun it is more important that you go than look back saying I could have.

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Old 14-01-2015, 08:59   #10
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

you mention panama as a place to look there are a number of boats for sale both sides of the country and hundreds of islands to explore and never really leave panama waters ,, you could get you a pensianado cedular and become a resident easily ,, buy my boat 42 solaris and i will walk you through the entire process ,, i retired here at age 55 /// 68 now loving it ,,
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Old 14-01-2015, 09:11   #11
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

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Originally Posted by svfraidknot View Post
you mention panama as a place to look there are a number of boats for sale both sides of the country and hundreds of islands to explore and never really leave panama waters ,, you could get you a pensianado cedular and become a resident easily ,, buy my boat 42 solaris and i will walk you through the entire process ,, i retired here at age 55 /// 68 now loving it ,,

Svfraidknot. Please pm me the details of your boat. Or send me a link to it. Thanks.


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Old 14-01-2015, 09:15   #12
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Well done you. Do yourself a favour and do not listen to the detractors to your dreams. They shall tell you a heap of reasons not to go especially that of schooling. Please see: Yacht Mollymawk — The cruising log of the good ship Mollymawk
The family have three children, all educated aboard without following a formal curiculum.
We have four children - born aboard. They have been 'home schooled' aboard by myself and my wife following our creed of education. Our eldest, twins, have just been accepted into medical school (university).......proof of the pudding.
You also hear of people telling you that you must do this or that you must do that. Read what you can and have confidence - and buy the sailboat that meets your criteria and not that of what others tell you it should be. There are a lot of arm chair experts. We have heard these specialists rattle off about all sorts of issues. Watch:
which is about a young Aussie couple without any experience but whom are making their way adequately across the Med. having zero sailing experience. I would not advocate total lunacy but sometimes you need to go for it. There is nothing like experience and if you act with reasonable caution you can gain this you go along. Good luck fella, and thanks for your openess and honesty.
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Old 14-01-2015, 09:20   #13
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Brilliant, its a move you guys shall never regret. There shall be a few down moments but the many highs outweigh these. The sailing fraternity (at sea) are very supportive.
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Old 14-01-2015, 09:26   #14
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pirate Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

Still say BVI Yachts... that boat is totally kitted.. so much so as things break down you can just toss em out and in a coupla 3 years you'll be coming down to that Pearsons level..
Plus..its a damn sight more liveable on..
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Old 14-01-2015, 09:46   #15
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Re: Trying to complete my dreams and make memories

What's the link to the BVI yacht? By end of feb I'd like to have a boat in the slip.


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