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Old 24-09-2016, 07:42   #136
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

I'm past my bedtime..... good night.
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Old 24-09-2016, 08:43   #137
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pirate Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Originally Posted by Sofie B View Post
In all reality, if someone turns out or becomes mentally unstable , the issue is no longer about you. You then have a responsibility to a sick person. You then need to figure that out first. It is for the safety of all on board, seriously.
Sorry Sophie.. you have, as skipper responsibility for the boat and everyone else on the boat.. there's no time for Social Services and all that stuff..
Its a basic case off de-escalate the situation as quickly as possible then when sanity is restored find a solution.
Its not a democracy at sea..
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Old 24-09-2016, 08:49   #138
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Sorry Sophie.. you have, as skipper responsibility for the boat and everyone else on the boat.. there's no time for Social Services and all that stuff..
Its a basic case off de-escalate the situation as quickly as possible then when sanity is restored find a solution.
Its not a democracy at sea..
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Old 24-09-2016, 09:42   #139
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

Well. This was an interesting journey.
I do have a question.
The subject of crew going off there meds. Thats something that never even crossed my mind, although it should have since I witnessed it first hand, and yes I agree that would be a major problem.
But what if its the captain that goes off their meds?
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Old 24-09-2016, 09:55   #140
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Well. This was an interesting journey.
I do have a question.
The subject of crew going off there meds. Thats something that never even crossed my mind, although it should have since I witnessed it first hand, and yes I agree that would be a major problem.
But what if its the captain that goes off their meds?
Jeepers, what made you think of that?
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Old 24-09-2016, 10:49   #141
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Jeepers, what made you think of that?
I wonder
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Old 24-09-2016, 12:00   #142
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pirate Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Sure, Boatman :-)

[/I]:-)

TrentePieds
Don't know about your side of the pond.. but over here this is a riggers tool kit.. kinda different.. I could say a Bowie knife was a rigging knife.. but it does not make it one.
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Old 24-09-2016, 12:14   #143
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

Bowie knife is a kitchen utensil used for skinning sharks.
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Old 24-09-2016, 13:43   #144
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Bowie knife is a kitchen utensil used for skinning sharks.
I used it a few weeks ago to kill a tuna, the other day to open a box and just yesterday to cut off the chafed end of a dockline.
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Old 24-09-2016, 15:04   #145
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Sorry Sophie.. you have, as skipper responsibility for the boat and everyone else on the boat.. there's no time for Social Services and all that stuff..
Its a basic case off de-escalate the situation as quickly as possible then when sanity is restored find a solution.
Its not a democracy at sea..
I kinda thought that is what I was getting at and had no intention of giving Keno... advice cos he doesn't do advice yeah but nah . I was merely suggesting if someone became unstable ,it would be prudent to deal with that person first for everyone's safety. Now my head hurts and I've lost an hour somewhere and lost a bottle of wine somewhere. Good thing I'm home in bed an' not on the boat innit
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Old 24-09-2016, 22:09   #146
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

When in the delivery business, I was very careful about who I brought aboard as crew, interviews, CV's, recommendations from folks I knew well and current crew members. I found the most reliable, helpful and willing crew were young women between 25 and 35 years of age wanting to get seatime in, learn a skill like navigation or mechanics. The strength difference was never a problem as they could do pretty much anything their male counterparts could do. Several went on to earn their masters ticket and one went on to the CA Maritime Academy.
The only clanger I had in close to 15 years in the business was bringing my own boat back from Mexico to SD. I was rushed to leave Cabo to make a weather window and did not follow my own rules in vetting crew and picked up a young man who, along with my son, agreed to bring my boat/home north with me. Turns out he was a manic depressive who was out of his meds and we had to physically restrain him before heading back to Cabo, a 2 day trip. To this day, I'm glad my son was along otherwise it would have been a grim situation. After dropping our ill crewman off at the Hospital in Cabo, my son and I gunk holed our way up the coast over about 10 days.
Since then, I am very leary of taking guests or paying clients along and have turned down several owners who wanted to 'come along for the ride' on a delivery.
There can only be one Captain and the crew must acknowledge and accept this before the vessel leaves the dock. If you are not up to the task, hire a shipper and watch how he does his job. Just my 2 cents... Phil
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Old 25-09-2016, 00:04   #147
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

Getting back to crew management, I think that there's a lot of wisdom in the military's doctrines on leadership. I've found this interesting:

http://www.dimondjrotc.org/Leadershi...1L4A0_Text.pdf

June 2014: 11 Timeless Principles of Leadership (US Army 1948)

Among many other relevant things: "Leadership is not a thing; it's a relationship."

We've heard on here:

"My boat; my rules"

"It's not a democracy"

And I completely agree. But in order to implement those rules, you have to get people to follow them. In order to have authority in your non-democratic world, this authority has to be created. These things don't happen automatically. Sailors are not robots, where you can just push a button.

Even in the military, where unlike on board a pleasure vessel, failure to follow orders is a crime, you can't just push a button. The process of getting people to pull together for a common purpose (including a pleasure cruise!) and work as a team, is called leadership. It's needed even more when managing volunteer crew.
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Old 25-09-2016, 00:45   #148
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

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Originally Posted by Dockhead View Post

Even in the military, where unlike on board a pleasure vessel, failure to follow orders is a crime, you can't just push a button. The process of getting people to pull together for a common purpose (including a pleasure cruise!) and work as a team, is called leadership. It's needed even more when managing volunteer crew.
Only a few people develop true leadership skills where the crew/staff respect them enough to trust implicity and comply.

It depends on the ability of the Captain/owner and the willingness of others.

True leadership is where the captain can demand compliance in such a way that the crew/staff do it regardless of their own opinions.

It is indeed as Dockhead says, a relationship.

For example, many people own a business, but does not mean they know how to run it...

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Old 25-09-2016, 04:59   #149
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

You will notice a leaner and sleeker thread here now...

Please lets keep the peace and enjoy the day.

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10% of conflicts are due to different opinions. 90% by the tone of voice.
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
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Old 25-09-2016, 18:45   #150
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Re: How Much Abuse do you Tolerate on Your Boat

Quote: "The process of getting people to pull together for a common purpose"

Like in Fisher and Ury's Getting to 'Yes'?

Old hat by now, and pretty Polly-Anna , but the stuff works!TrentePieds
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