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Old 31-05-2014, 05:40   #1
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Question Abandon Living Aboard

Close to start with our dream to spend 2 or 3 years sailng in the Carib (island hoping), I was wondering if someone in this "Confessional forum" had a similar experience and had abandoned his project to live aboard couple........either run out of money or coexistence problems or tired of living on a boat, etc.
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Old 31-05-2014, 06:26   #2
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Re: Abandon living aboard

In my early 30s, I spent two years cruising in the Caribbean. My companion had a drinking problem that the cruising lifestyle definitely worsened. After a particularly stressful encounter with a tropical storm (drunks do not make the best decisions!), I had had enough. But at that stage of my life, two years was probably enough anyway. I had already crewed on a delivery involving 11 days at sea and knew I didn't want to do the long passages required to sail around the world.

Now, with a much different partner, I am planning for the retirement stage of my cruising life. We will keep the house for the summers and cruise the Bahamas in the winters. If my partner is game, after a year or two of that, we will go down island. I have been helping elderly parents, and I know that eventually I will need to stay ashore (unless I die younger than I want to). So I am not thinking this is what I will do, nonstop, for the rest of my life. Knowing I will take breaks, knowing I have a shore base, makes the nuisances of cruising much easier to take.

When I was cruising before, the happiest couples I saw (pretty much everyone else was the age I am now, or older) had a land base as well as the boat, and flew home every few months for a break.
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Old 31-05-2014, 06:29   #3
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Re: Abandon living aboard

I've never abandoned living aboard and don't think I ever would as long as I am healthy enough to enjoy it. But, I don't live on board all year due to work, relationship and boat locations. I do have plans in a year or two to take the boat south in winter and that will change the equation. But, for the last eighteen years I have spent at least half the year living on board. I could never see myself spending all my time back on land. But, could easily live on board full time if work and other issues did not get in the way. But, what works for me may not work for others. Hell, even Lynn and Larry Pardy don't spend all their time on their boat.
I've had friends who cruised for several years and are no longer together and neither have a boat now.
I've seen others who do it for about two years and then sell the boat. I know of others who have lived on board for decades and are still doing it. Until you try it you will never know if it is right for you. One thing you have to remember is that life on a boat is not always like a Jimmy Buffet song. There are ups and downs. But, I've always found their to more of an upside.
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Old 31-05-2014, 20:56   #4
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Re: Abandon living aboard

Quote:
Originally Posted by ricorrea2002 View Post
Close to start with our dream to spend 2 or 3 years sailng in the Carib (island hoping), I was wondering if someone in this "Confessional forum" had a similar experience and had abandoned his project to live aboard couple........either run out of money or coexistence problems or tired of living on a boat, etc.
It's more common than people want to ever admit, but as someone that sells cruising gear for people's dreams....

.....I get calls all the time from the new owners asking questions on how to finish the 3/4 done install when the original owners dream fell through.

Remember, most of the people "planning" to go cruising will never make it, some just become chat room experts on it...
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Old 01-06-2014, 07:12   #5
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Re: Abandon living aboard

We cut our ties to the land 23 years ago and haven't looked back. Our second and new to us boat opened up a new world of cruising that we couldn't do with our former boat and the adventure began once more. 17 years on a sailboat and now almost 6 year on a trawler and we have no plans to move ashore yet. In that time, we have met many, many cruisers and a very small percentage of them got off the boat almost as soon as the cruise began. It isn't for everyone and there are times that seem like magic and there are times when you wonder about your sanity for choosing such a lifestyle. When the dream collides with the reality, it is more than some folks can take. We wouldn't trade this lifestyle for anything and sometimes it's just as described in the sailing magazines. Sometimes it's not. Chuck
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Old 01-06-2014, 07:25   #6
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Re: Abandon living aboard

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Remember, most of the people "planning" to go cruising will never make it, some just become chat room experts on it...

I imagine it is like you said. However, in my case, we are ready to start.

But I don't know if our plan of 2 or 3 years becomes 2 or 3 month (or more dramatic 2 or days).

I expected more confessional forum's members sharing their experiences if their cruise was shortened.

Perhaps, most of the cases who depart, were successful
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Old 01-06-2014, 15:42   #7
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Re: Abandon living aboard

ricorrea2002,

Perhaps those who abandon liviing aboard and/or cruising are disinterested in CF.

Ann
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Old 01-06-2014, 16:15   #8
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Re: Abandon living aboard

Depends what you mean by abandoned?

If you sell off and live on land for a while and come back in N years is that abandoned?

If you go back to school or run out of money, but come back later in life?
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Old 01-06-2014, 18:01   #9
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Re: Abandon living aboard

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Originally Posted by ricorrea2002 View Post
I imagine it is like you said. However, in my case, we are ready to start.

But I don't know if our plan of 2 or 3 years becomes 2 or 3 month (or more dramatic 2 or days).

I expected more confessional forum's members sharing their experiences if their cruise was shortened.

Perhaps, most of the cases who depart, were successful
Take it one day at a time.
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Old 02-06-2014, 06:55   #10
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Re: Abandon living aboard

Well,I have lived aboard (marina type 2) ; cruised and anchored out exclusively (type 3) for two years;but have never done what I call type 4 cruising ,i.e. cutting all ties and sailing off into the blue for an indefinite period and never looking back "taking it as it comes" as it were nor does that impulse pull on me like it did years back in my 30s.
OK, I was lucky to have made a number of long ocean passages in my 20s ( NY to Europe ,Africa, deliveries etc.,so after 40+ years of cruising in sailboats from 11 feet to 72 feet do not hunger for those long ocean passages that type 4 entails. My long distance jones has been sated. I still sail / cruise more than any I know personally and am fortunate to live in the Eastern USA where there is always a new harbor and adventure nearer home.
The truth is that living on land is way easier than on a boat especially with the limited recourses most of us live under. Once the boater moves from type 1 to type 2 life makes even more demands (significantly higher level of seamanship and self-sufficiency etc.).
Now, to e effectuate the newbe escapist dream of type 4, another quantum leap is required that only the most dedicated ,resourceful,knowledgeable (and lucky) can achieve.
If the reader can agree with much of the above it is easy to see why the live-aboard dreams get abandoned: even with taxes,crime, pollution,what have you…life is easier and more predictable on land. Boats are still an expensive way to go third class.

So for my stage in life, I my have the best of both worlds: a fine and interesting land life, with an ocean-ready craft that is readily single handed and gets extensive use and gives immense satisfaction…just call me a type 1 cruiser,still better than a 0.

I must admit that I did turn down a fine offer in my 20s to do a world cruise (type4 ) in a 72' yawl that have given me some regrets………………last week I purchased a lottery ticket



………….luv you all……………………….mike………………...
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Old 04-06-2014, 17:58   #11
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Re: Abandon living aboard

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Originally Posted by mrohr View Post
If the reader can agree with much of the above it is easy to see why the live-aboard dreams get abandoned: even with taxes,crime, pollution,what have you…life is easier and more predictable on land. Boats are still an expensive way to go third class.
Thanks Mike, these kind of comments I expected. I love to read the others, they inspire me even more me with my dream.

But it is good to hear others points of view, like yours.

I must admit that it is more comfortable stay at home in my soft coach than to live in a boat (even a coupe of years), nevertheless I hope the trade offs will make our lives more intresting.......
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Old 04-06-2014, 18:53   #12
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Re: Abandon living aboard

We are semi retired, week on, week off. Week in our apartment, week on the boat, all winter, even frozen in solid. I'll take the boat rather than the big city.
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Old 04-06-2014, 19:01   #13
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Re: Abandon living aboard

Happens all the time. My in-laws spent 140K on a really nice boat. Left the slip 3 times in a year while they lived aboard in the tropics. It's for sale.
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Old 06-06-2014, 08:18   #14
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Re: Abandon living aboard

Guess I am a type 2-3-4-5 cruiser... or a life time junkie. I lived aboard 10 years and raced intensively in my 20s and 30s in Vancouver. Moved to Europe in my late thirties and went boat less for 3 years...A dark time in my life!!! Bought and restored our present boat after that (living on land arghh) ...it is an addiction I tell you!! I am getting ready for my 3rd Atlantic crossing, first one was a singlehanded adventure. Note all in the same boat. We, my family and I just finished a 14 month sail about ...Denmark to the Chesapeake via the Canaries, Cape Verdes and up the chain from the Martinique. We discussed continuing but we have been back a year and are getting mails from around the planet. Why did we come back...our kids 11 and 13...this is their time to establish links those links to land.
In all I have spent over 25 % of my life in boats..I am an oceanographer as well so sailing is my hobby and my job my passion. I have spent months at sea...

People quitting: When living aboard in Vancouver I used to watch the folks from the prairies who wanted to live their dream. They usually sold the ranch, bought a new boat and commissioned it in Van then set off south...NO clue! never sailed seriously in their lives just had a dream. Lots of them either sold the boat in California or shipped her home. That can be a tough trip breaking boats and people. Very few made it mostly because the reality is IT IS NOT A JIMMY BUFFET Song or something out of the sailing rags.. It can be but it is also a lot of hard work and the sea is not kind! It just is!! start easy build up.

Communities or types
Type 1 The weekend sailors who have a different perspective, racers as well. They love sailing but enjoy all the land based luxuries. Lots of adrenalin rushes...YOu push boats to the limit when you race. Lots of friends but they have drifted. Here deep connections can be rare, most are adrenaline junkies. I still am!

Community 2. Those early years I spent in the arms of my liveaboard friends.. We all had same problems and were a very tight community. Many of the folks from that time are still friends although thousands of miles and decades away. Many of them dreamed of taking off...few did. Many were just happy living aboard and tinkering on their boats.. they are still happy either with their dreams or living them!

Community 3. The offshore community... you don't get into this until you are in either in a kick off harbour..or you have made your first multi day trip... say Norfolk to Bermuda or Plymouth to la Coruna.. Las Palmas.. Here you run into the wanderers. This community is very close and open.. You may only see them once or you may see them in the next harbour or the next. One forms friendships fast, we all help one another be it with expertise or bits and pieces.. you are always fixing something. Friendships tend to be intense. It is very hard to leave this community.. I have suffered withdrawal after every trip!!!

Money: you will never have enough just go... the art is to appreciate what you have and not lust after ...a bigger boat..car..winch. Go now.

Wind in the Willows

Water Rat solemnly, as he leant forward for his stroke. `Believe me, my young friend, there is NOTHING--absolute nothing--half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats. Simply messing,' he went on dreamily: `messing--about--in--boats; messing----'


It is either in you or it is not. Take it easy, watch the weather and enjoy!!!

A sailing junkie
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Old 06-06-2014, 11:17   #15
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Re: Abandon living aboard

We know several couples who abandoned the lifestyle a couple even got divorced.

Compare to even a 1 bedroom apartment and the space is tiny. Also most couples go off to work each day and see each other only a few hours a day. Change that to 24/7 with the need to coordinate who has the diny if you want to leave the house and it can put a strain on the relationship until you get used to it.

Plan on adapting your cruising style, having ways to have alone time and outside interactions as good ways to keep it from becoming confining.

Interestingly, I am doing a short stint working in the office and I really miss not having her around all the time.
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